123. Midlife Emergence with Jen Berlingo

FINE is a 4-Letter Word

Many of us go through life wondering if we’re really living our authentic lives.

Are you doing what you really want to do?

Are you being who you really want to be?

Even if you’ve created a great life, been fortunate, and haven’t had what you consider an existential crisis, is something just not quite right?

Jen Berlingo had what seemed to be a great childhood. As she would discover later, she thought she was happy because early on she embraced being a good girl, a people pleaser, and as a result got a lot of praise from her parents, relatives, and everyone else around her.

There was something under the surface though. Growing up in the south in the 80s and 90s, she was exposed to homophobia, racism, a tight grip on monogamy, pseudo-Christianity, and other harmful sentiments coming from the same people whose love brought her happiness. This caused her to deny something she knew to be true.

Jen went through what one might call a normal amount of teenage rebellion, became an adult, started a career, got married, and had a child. She had a happy life, and everything seemed fine.

But Fine is a 4-Letter Word.

As she approached middle age, she achieved a new level of consciousness about herself that led her to ask "Wait. What is my core self? Where's my authentic self?" She started peeling back the layers of familial, cultural, and social conditioning that had allowed – maybe even required – her to adapt to her environment.

See, throughout all of this, Jen knew she was queer.

While this proved not to be as devastating to her domestic situation as she anticipated, it did end her marriage. And although she continues to have a great friendship with her ex-husband, this acknowledgement did bring on a lot of changes.

As part of these changes, Jen took a deep dive into what are known as introjects – the beliefs and values one unconsciously absorbs from the people they love and the society they’re raised in.

Are your beliefs and values, especially the ones you’ve never questioned, actually a defense mechanism that has shielded you from the risk of being your authentic self?

In a moment, when you meet Jen, you will learn a lot more about her journey and why she redefines the idea of a “midlife crisis” as Midlife Emergence. Is this the message you need to hear today?

Jen's hype song is "Apeshit" by the Carters.

Resources:

• Jen Berlingo’s website: https://jenberlingo.com/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenberlingo/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenberlingotherapy/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jenberlingo/
• X (formerly Twitter): https://x.com/jenberlingo/

See Yvonne Marchese’s episode, “Flip The Script” at https://zenrabbit.com/podcast/flip-the-script-yvonne-marchese/

Invitation from Lori:

Like Jen, it’s possible you’re rationalizing your life by telling yourself no one gets everything they want but you can still feel fine with what you have.

That shouldn’t stop you – and that’s why I created the 5 Easy Ways to Start Living The Sabbatical Life guide.

Once you read it, you’ll

✅ Discover a counter-intuitive approach to making intentional changes in mindset and lifestyle.

✅ Learn how to overcome the fear of being seen as a lazy slacker.

✅ Find out how to face fears, step out of your comfort zone, and rewire your beliefs.

It’s only 7 pages, so it won’t take you long to get through. The five tactics are simple, but once you follow even ONE of them, you’ll find yourself feeling more peaceful and even courageous.

When you’re ready to say F*ck Being Fine, then this guide is the place to start. It’s time to blaze a new trail and chart a new course!

Go to https://zenrabbit.com right now to download it for free.

Now, let’s go meet Jen. Believe me what I say, you won’t regret it!