Episode 34 : Part 3 - Bad habits - Fighting and overcoming them

Letters to my kids: A suicide survivor's lessons and advice for life

Episode 34 : Part 3 - Bad habits - Fighting and overcoming them

Music: “Just A Blip” by Andy G. Cohen From the Free Music Archive Released under a Creative Commons Attribution International License

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201108/5-steps-breaking-bad-habits https://www.developgoodhabits.com/break-bad-habit/

- And what did they notice? Mindful smoking “Smells like stinky cheese and tastes like chemicals. Yuck.”

- Now the prefrontal cortex, that youngest part of our brain from an evolutionary perspective, it understands on an intellectual level that we shouldn’t smoke and it tries its hardest to help us change our behavior, to help us stop smoking, to help us stop eating that second, that third, that fourth cookie—we call this cognitive control, we’re using cognition to control our behavior. Unfortunately this is also the first part of our brain that goes offline when we get stressed out which, isn’t that helpful.

- When we get curious, we step out of our old, fear-based reactive habit patterns. This isn’t to say that, poof, magically we quit smoking but over time as we learn to see more and more clearly the results of our actions we let go of old habits and form new ones. The paradox here is that mindfulness is just about being really interested in getting close and personal with what’s actually happening in our bodies and minds from moment to moment.

"Even the most fickle are faithful to a few bad habits." -Mason Cooley

- This might sound too simplistic to affect behavior, these are bite-sized pieces of experiences that we can manage from moment to moment rather than getting clobbered by this huge, scary craving that we choke on. Everyone has at least one bad habit.

- They started with chronic lateness: When you consistently fail to show up on time for social engagements or meetings, are you actually trying to exert control over those you keep waiting? They now are living on your time, not theirs.

"Nothing happens until the pain of remaining the same outweighs the pain of change." – Arthur Burt

- Decide that you really want to change and convince yourself that you can. You can only change what you decide you want to change. All psychological models of change emphasize the importance of commitment as a necessary first step. If you don't see a problem, you won't work on changing your behavior.

- Once you've decided you want to change, convince yourself that you are able to achieve your change goals. You need to strengthen your sense of self-efficacy, or belief that you can accomplish what you want. Seeing other people change successfully is inspiring, but you need to see yourself as having what it takes to make those changes in yourself.

"I think that you can fall into bad habits with comedy... It's a tightrope to stay true to the character, true to the irony, and allow the irony to happen." -Ben Kingsley