Episode 21 - Trust and trusting people; a side story and warning

Letters to my kids: A suicide survivor's lessons and advice for life

Trust and trusting people; a side story and warning

Music: “Just A Blip” by Andy G. Cohen From the Free Music Archive Released under a Creative Commons Attribution International License

- Loneliness exposes people to a diverse range of significant risks to mental and physical well- being. It affects people of all ages, but is often triggered by particular life events such as bereavement, poor health, or cognitive impairment.

Facilitating social engagement in community activities to promote older people’s self-esteem can help build their resilience. This can then reduce the likelihood that they will respond to scams. Stockholm syndrome and providing support by being there for the victim.

"Don't trust everything you see. Even salt looks like sugar" - Maryum Ahsam

The phrase was reported to have been coined by criminologist and psychiatrist Nils Bejerot. It was formally named in 1973 when four hostages were taken during a bank robbery in Stockholm, Sweden.

There are four key components that generally lead to the development of Stockholm syndrome:

A hostage's development of positive feelings towards their captor No previous hostage-captor relationship A refusal by hostages to co-operate with police forces and other government authorities A hostage's belief in the humanity of their captor, for the reason that when a victim holds the same values as the aggressor, they cease to be perceived as a threat.

"A classic example is domestic violence, when someone - typically a woman - has a sense of dependency on her partner and stays with him," says psychologist Jennifer Wild, a consultant clinical psychologist at the University of Oxford.

"She might feel empathy rather than anger. Child abuse is another one - when parents emotionally or physically abuse their children, but the child is protective towards them and either doesn't speak about it or lies about it."

"It takes 20 years to build a reputation and 5 minutes to ruin it" - Warren Buffett

If it seems to good to be true; it probably is. People can only offer and tempt you, it's your responsibility if you fell for it. To trust or not to trust, that is the question

When in doubt, exercise caution. However, what usually happens to us is that the excitement of the new project makes us open ourselves up too much, to the point of sharing the wrong information with the wrong people.

Take a step back and re-look. If it is REALLY as good as it seems, it can surely wait while you do some due digilience. After all; you owe it to yourself to be careful.

"Trust yourself, you know more than you think you do." - Benjamin Spock

Reliability is undoubtedly the cornerstone. Entrust your wishes and dreams with those who have shown you on other occasions that you can trust them, people that don’t judge you and that always accept you for who you are.

Trust is to be earned

Being guarded about whom I trust is not limited to money situations. I am also extremely careful to whom I provide information I would not want shared. I have learned the best way to keep information private is not to tell anyone, including those you trust. Let me also suggest being cautious of anyone who indicates any religious affiliation. While I am a person of faith, I don’t talk about my faith in business situations or when I am trying to earn someone’s trust. When people start talking about their faith in order to gain your trust, be extra careful.

You have nothing to lose by being cautious, guarding your trust until people have proven they are trustworthy. At the same time, you have everything to lose, including your savings, damaged relationships, and your reputation, if you give away your trust easily.

"Trust, but verify" - Ronald Reagan

It doesn't make what was done right, but it does mean you should have been more careful. BUT we live and learn. Because all of us were once there and have failed too. So; don't be too hard on yourself, but you need to have learnt the lesson.