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The Communication Coach

The Communication Coach

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For over a decade Nicky has been a Hostage & Crisis Negotiator dealing with people/families in crisis. She has also had the privilege of being the Course Director for the National Negotiation Course in the UK & travelled round the world teaching communication & negotiation. She has studied psychology, relationships, human behaviour, personal development coaching & communication & in these podcasts she shares with you how the power of Hostage & Crisis Negotiation can be used in every day comm ...
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For many of us Christmas is a time to relax and have fun but for some of us it's a time we spend with people we don't really know or necessarily even get on with.It's also often a period filled with difficult conversations, emotion and breakup of many relationships.In this episode Nicky speaks to Janthea Brigden. Janthea owns a company called Nippe…
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In this episode Nicky looks at four areas to help you have those conversations you have been putting off.Emotions - why conversations with our families can often be driven by emotions and the impact of this.Consequences - what they are and why you should think about them before you have the conversation.Beliefs - both yours and the person who you a…
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In this track Nicky looks at two common questions she is asked. She shares the 4 P's;Purpose - what outcome do you want from this conversation and why is it so important to you.Practice - what you are going to say and how you are going today it.Permission - give yourself permission to ask.Perspective - look at the world from the other person's poin…
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In this episode Nicky chats to Jo Berry. Jo's father, Sir Anthony Berry, was killed by an IRA bomb in 1984.In 2000 Jo met the man who had planted the bomb, Patrick Magee. This is her amazing story which touches on so many aspects of communication and being human. It's hard to describe this story so the best thing to do is listen as Jo tells it in h…
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In this track Nicky explains why she believes communication is such an important skill and yet one of the core functions of every day that gets forgotten about. When we speak to each other it's generally from an unconscious place and we don't think about the words we are saying or how we are approaching the conversation. When we become more conscio…
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In this episode Nicky looks at 5 steps you can take when having difficult conversations and help you to be heard.The last year and this most recent lockdown has been a challenge for everyone and sometimes this affects our relationships and our ability to communicate with others.Af The Communication Coach
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In this episode Nicky gives you five tips to help you become more confident in your conversations. Perhaps you struggle to be heard in meetings or at home, or do you struggle to get your message across in meetings.Actions for you to take:1. Practice2. Listen to what other people say and then reflect back what you have heard.3. Quietening your inner…
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As we enter the second month of this current lockdown, relationships are beginning to breakdown as people struggle with home schooling and working from home. Families have forgotten to make quality and fun time for each other as this way of life becomes the new normal. In this episode Nicky gives us four tips on how to communicate with our families…
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Part 5 of this mini course where Nicky gets you to reflect on how you communicate. Listening is at the heart of building relationships, being fully present with someone with no judgement or trying to problem solve is incredibly powerful when it comes to building relationships and gaining trust. Without trust relationships fail, without listening an…
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In this episode we look at the think, feel, do cognitive behaviour model and how this affects the way we behave and communicate with each other.Nicky shares some of her own stories in how this works for her and how reflection is the key to change.Sometimes we don't know what we don't know, understanding how we work as individuals helps us to be abl…
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In this episode Nicky looks at how fear drives us and causes emotional conversations rather than logical ones. She discusses how your inner critic is there to protect you and comes from the part of the primitive brain which causes fight, flight or freeze. Nicky also discusses how being control can have an affect on how we communicate with others an…
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This episode is part 2 from a 5 part mini series about self reflection and how to build relationships through communication.In this episode we loo at our own values and belief and what we believe to be true and how it drives our behaviour. Nicky gives you a challenge at the end of each session to help you become more reflective and consciously awar…
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This mini series is a 5 day course where Nicky helps you to become more self aware about how you behave and why. Today is all about self reflection and the challenge is to make your behaviour and communication more conscious. It is difficult to change if you are unaware of how you behave int he first place.…
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Welcome to our conversations from the coffee shop where we meet and talk to people about their lives and their stories.In this episode we meet Jess who shares her story of how she lost her partner to heart disease at an incredibly early age, how she dealt with this by in her words "running away" and how she fell into an abusive relationship and eve…
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In this episode we look at one of the ways we listen to other people, the "problem solving" way. This means we focus on how we can solve the other persons problem rather than how they might be feeling, or what might be going on for them. We also discuss the poem Please Listen by Leo Buscaglia. Leo's poem shows the effect telling someone what to do …
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In this track Nicky speaks to Susie. Susie is 16 and has struggled with her mental health. Susie tried to take her own life and was sectioned under the mental health act when she was 13 years old. Here she tells her story of her experience and how she is now paying it forward working with mental health organisations to help other people who might f…
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In this episode Nicky explains how validating how someone is feeling helps to build relationships and creates trust. This can be in a new relationship or with a family member. Sometimes we are quick to give advice or solve the problem for the other person rather than listening to what they are saying and how are they are feeling. Recognising how a …
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In this episode Nicky shares a recent car accident and how her emotional or limbic brain took over and how she managed to interrupt her thought patterns to gain control. She also shows how this can happen when we have arguments or react to something maybe one of our kids or partners have done and how this causes a breakdown in the relationship.…
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In this track Nicky shares why we talk about people behind their back, what drives us to this and what we can do to think about changing our behaviour.We've all done it been unkind about someone or moaned about them behind their back, we sometimes seem to thrive on belittling others but why?Sometimes the smallest change makes the biggest difference…
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In this track /nicky discusses how to make a great first impression and gives you four tips. She shares her stories from her negotiation world and being a step parent and makes this relatable to building any sort of relationship from a job interview, first date or becoming a step parent.Af The Communication Coach
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In this episode Nicky shares a story where she has been working under stress and how this has impacted the way she listened to her team and also communicated with them.In this episode you will learn:How to become more self aware so you recognise what your behaviour is.What to do if you find yourself caught up in the moment.What to do next.…
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In this episode Nicky shares one of her negotiations with a young girl in a tree with a noose round her neck. She talks about the lessons she learnt, what worked and how she uses this experience in communicating with her teenage daughter.Nicky also share her experiences in lockdown and gives you some tips on how to communicate with family during th…
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For over a decade Nicky had the privilege of being an international hostage and crisis negotiator. During this time she learnt everyone has a story and all of us experience some sort of crisis during our own lives. Each one of our stories has a life lesson someone else can learn from. Today's story is about loss, dealing with grief and how being pr…
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In this episode Nicky share her knowledge of how hostage have survived their time in captivity and what we can learn and use as we experience these challenging times. She also shares stories from her own life and how you can use these to create better relationships as we spend far more time with each other and change our daily routines.…
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Not everyone enjoys Christmas and sometimes we have to face challenges which seem exaggerated because of the time of year. In this episode Nicky shares some practical tips on dealing with our own emotions and also why there is conflict between people when deciding how to spend Christmas Day.Af The Communication Coach
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In this episode Nicky explores how telling a team member they must do something because the organisation or business demands it can leave the person feeling devalued. When this happens they become less motivated and engaged and you lose their interest and good will. Spending time in the moment listening to them and then working out a solution which…
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In this episode Nicky gives you 5 ways of how to have a conversation with someone in crisis. This episode is specifically for those people in an emotional relationship with someone else and how this can impact on our ability to be rational and how our belief systems can take over the conversation. she also shares her experience of negotiations and …
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We generally view the world through our own lens and what we believe to be true, when this happens we sometimes don't appreciate the other person is also viewing the world through their lens. This can cause conflict or misunderstandings. Once you are aware of how you view different situations then you can change how you communicate.…
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It can sometimes be difficult to have a conversation where you are going to tell someone how you feel. We often play the scenario round in our head and build it up. In this episode Nicky shows you how to approach having a a difficult conversation and ways of structuring taking ownership and control.Af The Communication Coach
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In this weeks episode Nicky discusses how misunderstandings in conversations can lead to ill feeling, relationship breakdown and possibly even caused the death of Thomas Beckett!! She also shows you ways of checking to make sure you understand the message someone gives to you and also how to check someone has received the message you meant to send.…
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In this episode Nicky describes how honest conversations are the root of strong relationships. she describes the three character traits of conflict, submissive, assertive and aggressive and how these impact on relationships. She also shows you how to have honest conversations, taking responsibility for your own feelings and phrasing these into a co…
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In this episode Nicky discusses what she has learnt from three conversations with younger people this week and how making assumptions reflects in how we communicate with others.She also explains what mirroring really is and how you can use this in every day communication to get the most from another person.…
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In this episode Nicky explains why saying what you believe is the right thing might not be the right thing. Have you ever had an emotional response when you have tried to solve someones problems or offer advice? Here are some reasons why this might be happening.Af The Communication Coach
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In this episode Nicky talks about how you can improve your life by listening and being aware of want you are saying. She also explains how talking negatively about yourself and others has a greater impact than you might realise and how you can change this to improve your life.Af The Communication Coach
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In this episode Nicky follows on with how to improve your communication skills and how it starts with you. She explains why having a greater understanding of yourself help you to work out what triggers your emotions and how to change the way you talk. She specifically focusses on how we love to blame others and its not until we take responsibility …
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