143 - Should I Give Up?
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We've been discussing the powerful statement of the Ramban, which teaches us that the opportunity to apply bitachon is completely independent of our actions. Of course, we always have to try to do our best - more mitzvos and less aveiros, whilst at the same time to internalize that the many statements that we are taught from Torah sources about the power of bitachon, that when we trust in Hashem exclusively, He comes through for us and delivers, that applies to any individual who is choosing to place their reliance and trust on Hashem independent of their actions.
We also discussed how many Torah sources teach that emunah, bitachon and tefillah are all synonyms, and the famous example from the verse in the Torah which states that Moshe Rabbeinu's hands were emunah, are translated by the Targum Unklus, as "he spread his hands in tefillah." Because again, the more one believes, trusts and relies on Hashem, the more one will pray to Hashem.
We also mentioned the well-known episode in the Gemara of Choni Hameagel, where there was a drought in the land of Israel, and he, being a tremendously pious and righteous individual, was called on to pray on behalf of the people. And as the Gemara recounts, he was extremely stubborn and vehement in making sure that Hashem listens to his prayer, drawing a circle around himself and swearing that he will not leave that circle until Hashem comes through and sends rain in the form of blessing that will benefit the people.
Although we do learn the tremendous power of tefillah from this episode, how Choni literally changed the course of nature, where there was a clear drought, and suddenly abundant rain began to fall, completely denying all the laws of nature, nevertheless, the Talmud goes on to criticize Choni for being so stubborn and vehement in the way he talked to Hashem. Although none of us can compare ourselves to the spiritual level of the tremendously righteous and pious Choni Hameagel, nevertheless, one take-home from this Gemara is that when we do daven to Hashem, we should not be overly brazen and vehement to get what we want.
And the question is, how do we reconcile this with other passages in the Torah, such as the episode where Moshe Rabbeinu was denied entry to Eretz Yisrael and he prayed no less than 515 times, constantly begging and begging Hashem to allow him entry. Perhaps he should have stopped earlier? Why pray so much when it is clear that Hashem did not want that? And we find many similar type of episodes recounted throughout Torah literature, such as by the matriarchs who were barren and constantly prayed to Hashem to be able to have children. And again, perhaps we could ask, if Hashem made them barren, and after making a few prayers they were not answered, maybe they should have stopped praying, trying to change Hashem's plans and course?
The bottom line take-home that we gain from these sources and many others is that it is Hashem's will that we never stop praying for what we desire. We are to pray and hope and have faith, emunah and bitachon that Hashem will come through for us, and if He didn't today, we are not to give up, but rather to hope and pray for tomorrow. However, we must also remember the passage about Choni Hameagel, that although we are called on to never stop hoping and praying, however, it is important to remember not to be overly brazen, stipulating certain conditions to Hashem that we require Him to meet for us.
"Thank you Hashem for teaching me that to pray in a stubborn way, making my own conditions for you to fulfill, is not necessarily what you'd like, whilst at the same time, to give up and stop praying is certainly not what you'd want. Thank you Hashem for the constant opportunity of tefillah."
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