249. Singles Night At Whole Foods

Topic Lords

Lords:

• Ian
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tEaI_bi-i8
• Shannon
  • https://www.oddityroadshow.com/
  • https://www.youtube.com/c/struccimovies

Topics:

• Official and unofficial remakes of Yojimbo
• Danny McBride shows, and how to balance character likability with dark comedy- examples of this done well vs poorly?
• I can't fix bad movie dialog mixing for everyone, but I can fix it in my own house
• The Chinese Checker Players by Richard Brautigan
  • http://kempwash.blogspot.com/2011/05/chinese-checker-players-by-richard.html

Microtopics:

• Songs that signify that this scene or moment is sophisticated.
• How to pronounce Debussy.
• Southern gothic dark comedy body horror.
• A weirdo from Twitter who can't email your employer because he doesn't know who you work for.
• The Glass Key's remake family tree.
• A drifter samurai coming to a town.
• A dude who shows up in town and decides to play all the criminal factions against each other.
• The scene where the protagonist sets the bed on fire and jumps out the window.
• Escaping from rum runners by convincing them that you've already escaped.
• Propping your gun on a cross and using Jesus to pull the trigger.
• A sorceress who spends the whole movie topless because it's one of those movies.
• Omega Doom starring Rutger Hauer.
• A robot who gets stabbed in a bar because the stabber needs to download his memories.
• Using a mook as a human shield.
• The supporting actor getting a better offer and quitting in between takes.
• Where you put the interesting part in your movie.
• A hobo who runs two crime syndicates.
• The story of two rival vice principals.
• Jim's theory for why cringe comedy shouldn't exist.
• Where cringe comedy has gone since Seinfeld.
• How to make an unlikable protagonist that people don't admire.
• Characters who aren't good at anything.
• The schlub.
• A montage of dad destroying model airplanes with a sledge hammer.
• Liking some things about someone while not liking other things.
• A monster who is very fun to hang out with.
• The character in the show who ends up in Florida.
• Marathoning Breaking Bad and Better Call Sail and ending up 40 years old no matter how old you were when you started
• Why you might not throw away a sound bar.
• Entering the Konami code to enable compression.
• What the Clear Voice feature actually does.
• Getting really agitated and putting the subtitles on.
• Thinking of something interesting to say and then forgetting it.
• Which one's the son and which one's the dad?
• Ripley vs. Ripley's Believe it or Not.
• Lobbying for more mean old lesbians in theatrical productions.
• Playing Chinese Checkers with a woman who outlived her husband by 70 years.
• Where you were when you realized that it's possible to outlive your spouse by 70 years.
• Bowling Alone.
• A place to meet people that isn't the play you go to drink or the place where you go to pray.
• All your friends who went sober in the last year.
• Liquor stores that only sells non-alcoholic products.
• Mocktail bars.
• Name tags that have different foods on them.
• Inappropriate attention in nerd spaces.
• Figuring out where you can go with all your sober friends.
• Who listens past the first five minutes of a podcast?
• AI-driven smell-o-vision.
• Searching automated transcripts to find things that people didn't say.
• The subtitler writing "knockos" whenever people in The Wire say "narcos" in a Baltimore accent.
• Streaming services cutting corners wherever possible in a desperate attempt to become profitable.
• Snitching on bootlegers of racist Disney movies.
• How to get banned from TikTok.

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