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Overcoming Addiction and Embracing Healthy Healing with Penni Feiner
Manage episode 344714735 series 2980544
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On today’s episode, Yuliana welcomes Penni Feiner to the podcast to talk about her brother’s entry into inpatient drug rehab, why it forced her to confront her own cocaine addiction, how she has managed to stay 25 years sober, and why yoga and mindfulness helped save her. As a lifelong feminist, executive director, and yoga enthusiast, Feiner has come a long way way since that young girl who stumbled in to free basing all those years ago. It wasn’t until after her brother, who also suffered from addiction, reached out for help and joined an inpatient rehab program that she even acknowledged that she had a problem.
She notes that, during this time, she turned to mindfulness, yoga, and meditation. And, in that process, she’s become her own best friend for the first time in her life. Feiner’s learned throughout her journey that, while addiction never goes away, her coping mechanisms allow her to at least sit with the intense emotions that accompany it. Penni recognizes that anxiety and stress are going to be parts of her daily experience and is no longer surprised about their presence. That’s why she’s gone on to help others do the same. As the executive director for Kula for Karma and co-founder of Be Still, her goal is to offer therapeutic yoga, mindfulness, meditation, and breathwork to individuals in the workplace or those who don’t have access to healthy healing modalities. As someone who knows a thing or two about addiction, Feiner has taken it upon herself to help others see the light, like she once did, and she continues that noble quest in her conversation with Yuliana here today
Episode Highlights:
- Battling a cocaine addiction at a young age
- Feiner’s brother’s breaking point
- Why addiction doesn’t go away
- Turning to food
- Her introduction to yoga and mindfulness
- Becoming your own best friend
Quotes:
“I had been challenged with a cocaine addiction. And I am about to celebrate 40 years clean and sober. I think coming to terms with my issue with coke and my brother, who had been admitted as an inpatient, really was the motivation.”
“I was part of a radical feminist group and a consciousness raising group for women. And we had loud voices at Colgate, because there were 100 of us and 3000 men.”
“I was a weekend warrior… I would be thinking during the week as Thursday approached about where I was going to go, how I was going to get the drugs, how long was my supply going to last.”
“Even with the years and years and years now of a yoga practice, mindfulness practice, and meditation, the notion of just being okay with feeling lousy has been challenging for me.”
“It's not so much about not being able to sit with the emotion as it is wanting to run from the intensity of the emotion, if that makes sense. I kind of got to this place with managing anxiety knowing that anxiety and stress are going to be a part of my experience on a daily basis. I'm not surprised anymore.”
“We were kind of like the dynamic duo. We really supported each other and took care of each other in a way that was very special and continues to fuel our friendship and our love for each other as siblings.”
“It's called Sita Ram. The beginning of the verse is: Turn obstacles into opportunities, turn challenges into change, turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones, turn losses into gains, same landscape, different eyes, make the breath go inside, dive into uncertainty, and take a ride.”
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