Episode 606: Blake Lively Strikes Back

Idiots On Parade, the Too Ugly for TV Podcast

00:00 Introductions

01:53 Blake Lively

12:40 Donald Trump Trolls Denmark

17:33 Matt Gaetz

23:48 Dumb Voters

32:15 The Death Penalty

—Happy New Year!

Up front, we berate all the podcasts who are on vacation and running old episodes.

They’re all lazy, and not worth listening to.

We also quickly touch upon unsung hero Luigi Mangione, who was arrested in the McDonald’s where Amy Vevera worked as a teenager.

(For the record, Amy wouldn’t have snitched.)

—nathan cannot explain why he’s so interested in this story, but he is.

Hollywood is an interesting animal, with publicists creating narratives that seemingly have nothing to do with reality.

Man-bun douchenozzle Justin Baldoni apparently went after Blake Lively over the summer, and she just hit back, hard.

With behind-the-scene texts and messages, it looks like she’s going to do to Justin what Dominion did to Fox News.

—Come hell or high water, the United States will own Greenland! And the Panama Canal!

Not really, but it’s funny (sad) that whenever Trump so obviously trolls, the media falls for it.

And, not just the media, Denmark has upped defense spending to shore up Greenland.
Which, if the U.S. really wanted it, means the invasion would take 5 minutes, instead of 5 seconds.

A side discussion involves nathan’s travels to Japan, and Guam, and his visits to businesses of ill repute.

—Talk about luck…

The House Ethics Committee released the damning report on Matt Gaetz, and he is offended.
Everything we all suspected is apparently true: he drank, did drugs, and slept with teenage girls.

(Or, at least one teenage girl.)

But, hey: don’t compare him to an Uber driver, because that would be unfair to the Uber driver.

(They’re kind, upstanding citizens. Unlike Gaetz.)

Also: why don’t Matt Gaetz and Hunter Biden have their own reality TV show? Give ‘em both money and drugs, and let them do what they do.

Eff the Kardashians, I’d watch the Gaetz/Biden show all day long.

—A couple weeks ago, really dumb Union Steelworkers were upset, because they supported Trump in the election, but then Trump said he wouldn’t support a merger that would protect steelworker jobs.

Now, NYC Firefighters, who for years have watched Republicans fight healthcare benefits for 9/11 workers, are shocked and upset that Republicans stripped benefits from the latest budget bill.

Look, there’s nothing wrong with voting Republican, just know exactly whey you’re doing it: you don’t care about anyone but yourself, and you’re rich.

That’s it.

Maybe you hate the LGBTQ community, sure, but if you’re middle or working class, and you think voting Republican will help you?

Well, it’s sad/funny that reality is now biting you in the butt.

Also: is college important?

Republicans say, “No!” unless it’s their kids going.

And foreign workers with good degrees.

Then, “Yes.”

Hypocrisy?

Of course!

The foundation of the Republican Party.

—Speaking of hypocrisy…

Joe Biden removed 37 of the 40 criminals on Death Row (federal prison), because the death penalty is bad.

Oh, but he left the 3 fellas on, because what they did was REALLY bad.

And by that, I mean, “political reasons.”

Because ethics and morals have nothing to do with politics, which is the only reason anything gets done in Washington.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com