A LITTLE HELP FOR OUR FRIENDS is a mental health podcast hosted by Jacqueline Trumbull (Bachelor alum, Ph.D student) and Dr. Kibby McMahon (psychologist, Intent FitHouse owner). The podcast sheds light on the psychological issues your loved ones could be struggling with and provides scientifically-informed perspectives on various mental health topics. As two Duke University clinical psychology Ph.D. trainees, Jacqueline and Kibby are learning along with you and share insights from their trai ...
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Unveiling the Dark Side: Exploring Sex Trafficking, Power Imbalances, and Abuse in the Celebrity World
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How well do you really understand the grim reality of sex trafficking? We challenge some of the most deeply-held misconceptions, revealing its unsettling proximity to our everyday lives. We confront the recent allegations against music mogul Diddy, exploring how power and abuse intertwine in complex ways, reshaping our understanding of consent and …
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Estrangement: The rising trend of cutting off toxic family members
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Welcome back to the first episode of our fifth season! Whether it's a temporary break or a permanent distance, many of us have cut off contact with a family member when the relationship has gotten too difficult. Estrangement is on the rise as more people are deciding to cut off contact with their parents to protect their mental health. In this epis…
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Season 4 Wrap up: From feeling lost to...a little less lost
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Well, this year has been trying, to say the least. From losing a beloved pet, coping with cancer, and career transitions, we open up about the challenges we've had to overcome throughout season 4. In this episode, we recap the season and reflect on the strategies we used to rebuild our resilience amidst turbulence. We also dive into how our struggl…
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Interview with Dr. Erin Berenz: Navigating sexual assault, trauma, and healing
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The #MeToo movement raised awareness of just how common sexual assault really is. Unwanted sexual contact can have devastating consequences on the victim's life through trauma symptoms that show up at work, at home, and in love. In this episode, Dr. Erin Berenz (associate professor at University of Illinois Chicago and co-founder of Rebound Health)…
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Interview with Dr. Marcus Rodriguez: Expert strategies for strengthening parent-teen relationships
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These days, the only thing harder than being a teen is parenting one. How do we even raise healthy adolescents and teens when they have the world literally at their fingertips and vapes look like harmless toys?? For this episode, we welcome back Dr. Marcus Rodriguez, a leading specialist in youth and family mental health. Dr. Rodriguez shares pract…
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Entitlement: Its Impact on Narcissism, Careers, and Relationships
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You deserve to have your dreams come true, to get what you want out of life, to always be treated like a queen!...or do you? In this episode, we talk about entitlement, the tendency to think you will get special treatment or resources no matter what. We discuss the pros and cons of entitlement, why it's more common these days, and tips for navigati…
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Dating Borderline Personality Disorder
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Love can feel "dysregulated" even in the best relationships with intense infatuation, disappointments, intimacy, and heartbreak. However, dating someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD) means these ups and downs can get extreme. In this episode, we talk about what it's like to be in a romantic relationship with BPD. We also give tips for …
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To Parent or Not to Parent? Exploring the Child-free Life
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Choosing to become a parent is one of the most important and impactful decisions one could make. But how on earth do we make such an important decision without really knowing how it'll turn out? In this episode, we discuss what the pros and cons of a child-free life. We also talk about the decision-making process around having children and whether …
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Interview with Dr. Matt Scult: How to Master Stress
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When did saying "I'm so stressed" become the norm? Stress seems to be a given for anyone out there adulting so it's hard to know when it becomes a problem and what to do about it. In this episode, we talk about stress with Dr. Matt Scult, VP of Clinical Science at Scenario, licensed psychologist, and Duke alum! We discuss what stress is, when is it…
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Parasocial Relationships: Connecting to the Stars
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When our levels of Netflix binges get so intense, we end up spending more time with our favorite characters or celebrities than anyone else in our lives. The connections we have to these stars is called parasocial relationships. In this episode, we delve into parasocial relationships, why we need them and what they do for us. We also discuss how in…
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Escaping the Trap: Unveiling the Reality of Narcissistic Abuse
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Relationships with narcissists can be thrilling, consuming, and completely devastating. Narcissists try to fill the void of their own insecurities by controlling or exploiting their loved ones, creating patterns of narcissistic abuse. In this episode, we talk about how people can tell if they're a victim of narcissistic abuse and what this unhealth…
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Living with Multiple Personalities: Meet the Parts!
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For this second episode on dissociative identity disorder (DID; commonly known as "multiple personality disorder"), we welcome back patient Molly to meet some of her other personalities! In our last episode, Molly and her therapist Dr. Caitlin Fang described what it's like to live with 13 other separate personalities or "parts," who all have their …
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Living with Multiple Personalities: A Story of Dissociative Identity Disorder
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Ever wonder what it's like to live with multiple personalities? Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is a rare condition that involves having at least two separate identities (also called "alters" or "parts") that can think and feel independently. In this very special episode, Dr. Caitlin Fang and her patient with DID tell us what it's like to live…
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Interview with Evan Katz: Dating tips for smart, strong, successful women
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"I have everything but the guy" is a common struggle for successful women these days. As we've discussed in previous episodes, dating is already difficult and can be even more so for strong, independent women. In this episode, the expert dating coach Evan Katz shares his insights on the challenges women face in dating, what they often do "wrong," a…
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The Big C: Living and Loving with Cancer
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Kibby has some unfortunate news to share: She has just been diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. As much of a shock as it is, cancer rates are on the rise in younger adults and no one knows why. Such a devastating illness can turn someone's life upside down in an instant- for the people diagnosed and also their loved ones. In this episode, Kibby a…
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Letting go of beliefs that hold you back
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A new year, new you. For the start of 2024, many people want to leave behind unwanted parts of ourselves. Some beliefs can haunt us and hold us back, like "I'm not good enough", "I don't deserve love," or "there is no way I can quit eating these chocolates" (or so we've heard). However, anyone who's tried to just let go of negative beliefs always f…
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Famously considered "man's best friend," our pets can be one of our most important sources of emotional support and companionship. From cats and dogs to hamsters and goldfish, pets become part of our family and losing them can come with a deep grieving process that isn't well acknowledged in our society. In this episode, we discuss the mental healt…
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Interview with Marcus Rodriguez: Recovering from chronic invalidation
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One of the biggest puzzles is why some people carry so much anger, pain, depression, or anxiety even though they haven't experienced a "real trauma." This might be a sign of chronic invalidation, when someone received consistent messages that their emotions aren't valid when they're growing up. Chronic invalidation can infect early caregiving envir…
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For Richer or Poorer: Fixing the Business Partner Relationship
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It's an exciting time when entrepreneurs find the perfect business partner to co-found a new company. However, many don't realize that a staggering 65% of startups fail because of cofounder conflicts. Entrepreneurs who overlook the importance of their business partner relationships are at high risk of misunderstandings, strategy disagreements, or r…
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This is our 100th episode of "A Little Help For Our Friends"! Of course, we celebrate this exciting milestone by reflecting on our successful failures. In this era, people are too afraid to put themselves out there and risk failure. However, we have always encouraged taking risks, trying new skills, saying "yes" to challenges that are scary but mea…
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We wrap up season 3 reflecting on this doozy of a year. Around a year ago, Jacqueline and Kibby were coming back from Portugal where Jacqueline was breaking off an engagement and Kibby was gestating a huge baby. We talk about the lessons learned during these major life changes, which inspired our episodes on healing from difficult relationships, po…
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Interview with Jared Glenn: How to make men better!
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In our last episode, we talked about how men are struggling these days with shifting gender roles, identity, and mental health. Now what? How can we help these men and, of course, the women who love them? Jared Glenn is our first returning guest to our podcast and has some answers. In this episode, Jared (writer, historian, father, and advocate), s…
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The Fall of Man: Are Men...Getting Worse?
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"Men are trash." "Why are all men such babies." "Ken in the new Barbie movie is insufferable...but also lowkey the best part of the movie." If you've said one one of the former statements, there's a reason for that. Men of this generation are experiencing a crisis of identity, purpose and mental health. In this episode, we discuss why men are legit…
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Interview with Emily Calandrelli: Encouraging women in STEM fields
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Careers in STEM fields are notoriously challenging for women. Female engineers and scientists often struggle with imposter syndrome, self-doubt and burnout as a result of trying to make it in these male-dominated fields. Emily Calandrelli shatters this glass ceiling as a former MIT engineer, science communicator, and host/producer of popular shows …
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Whether it's an occasional Netflix binge or one of the Seven Deadly Sins, laziness is often a poorly regarded quality. But what is it, anyway? In this episode, we search for a definition of laziness and explanations for why someone would be considered lazy. Based on the research on motivation in the workplace, we offer some evidence-based tips for …
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Interview with Akili Interactive: Can we treat mental health with video games?
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As helpful as traditional therapy can be, there simply aren't enough affordable therapists for everyone who needs mental health care. To address this growing problem, companies like Akili Interactive use technology to create innovative, accessible solutions for treating psychological disorders. In this episode, Dr. Adam Gazzaley (co-founder and Chi…
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Interview with Kendall Long: Bullying
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Bullying is a widespread problem that can have a devastating, psychological impact on victims. With the explosion of social media and the internet, bullying can now happen both in public spaces and at our fingertips. Kendall Long is a fan favorite from ABC's Bachelor franchise and co-host of podcast "Little Curiosities with Kendall Long." In this e…
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How do you show someone you love them? How does someone else make you feel loved in return? In 1992, Gary Chapman made "love languages" a household concept, proposing that we all have five main ways we prefer to give and receive love. In this episode, we discuss the five love languages and tips for how to show love according to each language. We al…
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Falling in love can be one of the most invigorating yet terrifying experiences of our lives. But what is it, really? When can we trust the fall and when should we stay cautious? In this episode, we discuss the science of falling in love and by reviewing some theories from psychological research. We also discuss the experiences of falling in loves f…
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It's a sad reality that many cultures promote ideal body types that we never seem to achieve. In this episode, we discuss body image issues: what they are, where they come from, and tips for protecting your mental health from them. We also discuss our personal relationships with body image from the perspective of race and family values. Check out: …
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A Personal Experience with Postpartum Depression
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In every episode, we talk about people struggling with mental health, and we are no exception. Kibby has been dealing with postpartum depression (PPD), exacerbated by identity shifts and sleep deprivation that are common with new parents. In this episode, we talk about Kibby's personal experience with depression and how it directly affected her rel…
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The Mind-Body Connection in Trauma
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The words of Thai Massage Master Pichest, we need to learn to "listen to body." Trauma and other emotions live in the body, sometimes sending us important signals through our physical sensations and physical health. In this episode, we talk about the magical connection between the mind and the body. Kibby also reminisces about her yoga teaching and…
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Interview with Jess Cook: The Intersection of Sexuality, Christianity, and Mental Health
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How can sexuality, spirituality, and mental health intersect and develop together? In this episode, we interview the first openly trans and nonbinary pastor of the Presbyterian Church, Jess Cook. We discuss gender, including how Jess came to identify as nonbinary, early signs that they were genderqueer, and how friends and family can help their lov…
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Can money buy happiness? Maybe! Financial stress is a major contributor to serious mental health issues, especially depression and anxiety. But the numbers on your bank statement are not the only things that determine your psychological wellbeing. In this episode, we discuss the research on the effect of money and financial hardship on mental healt…
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What if we told you that our brains can shut down to protect themselves? When we face intensely scary or overwhelming experiences, sometimes we disconnect from the present as a coping mechanism. This is called dissociation, a process of disconnecting from present experiences like your thoughts, feelings, memories, your body, or even reality itself.…
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Long-Term Signs of Emotional Abuse
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Emotional abuse can be the sneakiest form of abuse because sometimes we're not even sure it's happening. A slightly sarcastic insult, a veiled threat, or a judgment on your intentions, emotional (or"psychological") abuse is harder to detect than physical violence, but can wreak havoc on your mental health for years. In this episode, we describe wha…
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Interview with Dr. Kate Lund: Resilience in the Face of Mental and Physical Challenges
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When someone is diagnosed with a chronic mental or physical health challenge, it creates a host of difficulties for his or her loved ones: What does it mean to live with a new diagnosis? How do we cope together? Should we hold them to the same level of expectation or accommodate for their new limitations? Dr. Kate Lund is a licensed clinical psycho…
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Interview with Dr. Sanderson: Changing Your Attachment Patterns
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You and your loved ones may find yourselves making the same mistakes in love over and over again: avoiding commitment, choosing the wrong partner, analyzing and obsessing over every text, etc. Attachment theory taught us that we may have particular patterns in relationships, whether they're secure or insecure. However, are we doomed to make the sam…
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Whether we're aware of it or not, we're constantly judging things are good or bad, valuable or worthless, cool or not cool. Judging ourselves and others is such a common phenomenon, but it can lead to significant mental health and relationship issues. In this episode, we discuss being judgmental, what function it serves and how it can impair our we…
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Is your loved one an expert ghoster or the first one to run from a social situation? People with avoidant personality disorder (AVPD) are not just shy or a little aloof, but avoid relationships and social situations in order to hide a deep sense of inadequacy. In this episode, we describe what AVPD is, how it's different from similar disorders like…
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Do you have a loved one who is always the life of the party, everyone's best friend, and a "drama queen"? If so, they may have a touch of histrionic personality disorder! In this episode, we describe what histrionic personality disorder is and how it could be difficult for loved ones. Then, Kibby has a crushing realization about her own history wit…
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From Patrick Bateman, to Walter White, to Elizabeth Holmes, we're fascinated by people with antisocial personality disorder. Although, when we toss around similar terms like "psychopath" or "sociopath," it's hard to know what this disorder really is or even how to spot it in our loved ones. In this episode, we define what antisocial personality dis…
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We all know that high self-esteem is supposed to be good, but what is it, anyway? Is it just feeling good about yourself? What happens if you or a loved one has low self-esteem? In this episode, we define self-esteem and discuss an interesting theory of how self-esteem is a "sociometer" of our value in society. From this perspective, we give tips o…
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Convinced your loved one (or unloved one) is a narcissist but can't really tell? Narcissistic behavior can be hard to spot these days as it often shows up as expressions of shame, hurt, or even feeling like a victim. Vulnerable, or "covert" narcissism can be harder to identify than the arrogant, showy grandiose version but it can be just as damagin…
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The Joys and Horrors of New Parenthood
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People often say that becoming a parent is "the hardest thing" but also "the most joy you'll ever experience." What the hell does that even mean? As Kibby just became a new mom only a few weeks ago, she breaks down why having a newborn can be both amazing and challenging. We also discuss how crucial loved ones are during this time and how you can s…
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When you go through a serious break up, we often rebound into another relationship to ease the heartbreak. At this time, your loved ones may give you unsolicited advice about rebounding, such as "yes, get back out there!" or "no, take time to be single." What's the right answer? Is it good or bad to get into a rebound relationship right after a big…
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Difficult Decisions in Romance: Breaking off an Engagement
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We always have to make difficult decisions in romantic relationships, such as whom to choose, whether we should commit to someone, or when to leave. Although loved ones can sometimes want to weigh in on our difficult romantic decisions, it's hard for them to know exactly how to help. In this episode, we discuss Jacqueline's recent difficult decisio…
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We wrap up season 2 by reflecting on our episodes that focused on relationships, emotions and skills we can use to change our unhealthy patterns. Both of us have gone through our own personal, journeys with love, pregnancy, engagements, conflicts and intense feelings during this season. In this vulnerable final episode, we discuss lessons learned i…
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Only one basic emotion has the unique position of being one of the seven deadly sins and a criteria for a serious personality disorder: Envy! Envy is a feeling that comes from a desire to have what someone else has. Although it can motivate us to compete for resources and power, it can of course have an ugly side when it tips into aggression. In th…
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A little flare of jealousy when someone flirts with your partner may be exciting once in a while, but it can damage a relationship when it becomes intense or consuming. Unhealthy or "morbid" jealousy can reach levels of obsessive suspicions, controlling behaviors, checking emails and social media, or even violence. In this episode, we discuss unhea…
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