Betrayal, Hurt, and Anger: You Can Let It Go

Sex, Love, and Addiction

Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and a Florida State Qualified Supervisor for those seeking a license in Mental Health Counseling or Marriage and Family Therapy. In addition, she is also a Certified Professional Life Coach. Being a Therapist and a Life Coach gives her the unique ability to help clients heal from the past and live their best life today. In this episode, Dr. Crystal discusses what happens when a betrayed partner feels so angry and can’t seem to forgive. Is there ever a way out of this hurt? The answer is yes. Listen in for more.

TAKEAWAYS:

[1:40] A little bit about Dr. Crystal.

[2:50] When someone has been deeply betrayed/hurt, how does anger show up?

[6:00] Anger and pain shows up at different times.

[10:00] Despite all the pain, you have to take responsibility for when you are upset.

[12:50] Dr. Crystal shares her lego principal.

[15:45] What happens in the brain when someone gets better from depression?

[16:55] What is abusive behavior?

[19:50] What happens if you want to let go of your anger but you’re nowhere near forgiveness?

[25:45] You don’t need to let go of the anger, you just need to process it.

[27:45] If you’ve been betrayed, please consider therapy.

[33:10] What do you do if your family members get angry for you?

[37:05] Dr. Crystal likes to use the CBT Therapy method to help her clients through their pain.

[40:45] Does betrayal affect same-sex couples differently?

RESOURCES:

Sex and Relationship Healing

@RobWeissMSW

Sex Addiction 101

Seeking Integrity

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency

Out of the Doghouse by Robert Weiss

Crystalhollenbeck.com

QUOTES:

• “It’s normal to be angry, but you can’t hurt yourself for somebody else when you are angry.”
• “Sometimes anger can be very non-productive.”
• “No matter how much you’ve hurt him back, it’s not going to make him understand how much he’s hurt you.”
• “Forgiving doesn’t have to mean forgetting.”