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Transparently Speaking

Transparently Speaking

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We are Diana and Joy - two moms who each supported their children to transition in early elementary school to become their true selves. We are using our voices to reflect our child’s voices, and have navigated everything from family and friends, to health care offices and schools. We are here to share our experience and our learning along this transgender journey, to provide support and guidance, parent-to-parent, and if you find yourself on a similar journey, we want you to know that you ar ...
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Join Diana and Joy as they discuss the ongoing journey of supporting Samantha, a transgender athlete, in youth sports. This episode explores the importance of maintaining Samantha's privacy while ensuring her right to play. Hear their insights and correspondence with regional authorities to navigate these evolving policies. If you’re taking somethi…
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In Episode #78 we welcome a new voice and storyline to share another family's journey as they support their non-binary child. Joy introduces her friend Sophie, whose child recently named their pronouns as "they/ them." If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more l…
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In this episode, Diana shares a recent incident involving Clark with an organization they previously had to educate to ensure Clark’s equal rights. This new interaction sheds light on the deeper impact last year's events had on Clark and reveals that his wounds are still far from healed. Tune in to learn more about their ongoing journey in advocacy…
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In Episode #76, Joy and Diana reflect on how gender identity (and nondisclosure of gender identity) has influenced their thinking about who, when and how their kids might spend an overnight with others. Join us to hear a broader reflection on sexuality and how we navigate the topic for our cisgender kids, too! If you’re taking something away from o…
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In this episode, Joy and Diana discuss how their approach to managing summer activities has evolved since their children first transitioned. They explore the challenges and strategies related to their children using gendered facilities, such as bathrooms and locker rooms, and share their experiences navigating summer camps. Additionally, they refle…
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Join us in episode #74 to kickoff and celebrate pride month! Joy and Diana share another letter of hope and love, dedicated to any and all who might benefit from being seen and supported. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more …
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In this episode, Diana and Joy continue their discussion from last time, focusing on the book about a transgender boy that was shared in Dinah's class. It's an episode you won't want to miss, full of laughter and hope. Diana also shares a letter she wrote to the parents, which is a valuable resource. Tune in to hear Diana and Joy talk about navigat…
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In Episode 72, Diana shares the details of a school-based scenario that’s arisen, and how she’s preparing for the possibility of Dyna disclosing his transgender identity. Join Joy and Diana as they explore what’s different this time (vs. with Clark & Samantha), and listen to their reflection on how gender identity disclosure may help or hinder succ…
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Diana gives an update on preparing Clark to leave the house and go to school next year. Listen as things get real for Diana, as she realizes her feelings as she considers saying goodbye to her oldest child. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and…
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Join Diana and Joy as they share what's been holding them back from having conversations with their trans youth about intimacy and safe sex, and learn what they are taking away as opportunities for further conversation. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more …
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Diana talks about Clark's next steps after graduation and her feelings about them. Joy helps Diana explore what is coming up for her and provides perspective. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more people we can reach and suppo…
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Diana and Joy share their experience in discovering and navigating the news of Nex Benedict’s tragic bullying and death in Oklahoma. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more people we can reach and support. As always, feel free t…
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Join Joy and Diana for an update on the discussion with school district administration, as Joy pursues Samantha's eligibility to participate in the sport she loves. Listen to learn about an Endocrinologist's perspective on sex vs. gender, ongoing considerations for maintaining privacy in non-disclosure, and Diana's advice about how to set the tone …
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In this podcast episode (#66), Joy is getting ready for a meeting with her child's school district to discuss sports participation. The focus shifts to the importance of trust in the administration to safeguard her child's identity during this process. This prompts a broader conversation between Joy and Diana about the trust parents place in others…
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Joy, after many years, has returned to attending a support group. This leads to Diana and Joy reflecting on their experiences attending various support groups in Episode 65. They discuss the advantages and disadvantages of attending support groups. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provid…
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Join us in this episode to hear more about Diana and Clark's trip to Mexico in October. This episode is also a reflection and celebration of key learnings from 2023. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more people we can reach an…
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Diana and Joy discuss their holiday traditions and reflect on what the first years post-transition were like. They share their advice and lessons learned. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more people we can reach and support. …
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In this episode, Diana and Joy explore assumptions, fears, and challenges in giving, receiving, and asking for support. The concept of support is in the context of anti-trans legislation that has been passed or proposed in many states. Joy and Diana articulate the impacts of proposed anti-trans legislation, even when not likely to be passed into la…
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In episode 61, Joy and Diana talk about their experiences with how they approached family gatherings. They discuss everything from the tone of their presentation to setting boundaries. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more peo…
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In Episode 60, Diana and Joy reflect on the latest round of legislative bills being proposed in their state; one, named the “Help Not Harm Act,” is legislation similar to that which has been passed in 20 states. Also proposed is regulation around transgender participation in sports. Join to hear about Joy's reflection as Samantha continues to parti…
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Diana and Joy explore the concept of "Gender reveals" and their history in deciding whether or not to find out (before birth) what their children would be assigned at birth. They explore what the possible assignment meant to them and Diana also shares context around the historical economics of "finding out" the assignment prior to birth. If you’re …
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In Episode 58, Diana and Joy share stories and their family journeys of names, including how names were selected for their gender non-conforming children (to better reflect their identities). They also explore how emotion arises in relation to the meanings associated with names, including the challenge of disclosure and safety when a name feels mis…
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Diana and Joy start this episode discussing Diana's pre-school year meeting with Dinah's teachers. They explore being asked questions as well as finding people to answer their own questions. Who is an expert? If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners a…
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In episode 56, Diana discusses how she is handling helping Dinah's classmates misgender him less. She discusses her theories of why this is happening two years after he started at the school where he has always identified as a boy. Diana and Joy discuss how people's words may reflect various perspectives and not always what we imagine. If you’re ta…
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In episode 55, Diana and Joy share guidance and perspective on how parents and guardians might consider engaging with schools to support Transgender and gender non-conforming youth (given the changing social and political landscape). Topics explored include facility (bathroom & locker room) use, disclosure, and preferred name and pronoun usage. Sev…
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Join Joy and Diana in episode 54 as they share their personal interpretations of individual's social media posts, likes and comments. They explore specific examples of recent social media posts (by family and others) to gauge levels of support and openness to LGBTQ+ beliefs, and how this informs their choices and decisions to engage. If you’re taki…
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In Episode 53, Diana and Joy respond to listeners' questions and provide updates on Clark's after-high school journey, Samantha and Clark's newest gender-affirming care, Joy's move to a more affirming school district, and disclosure. This episode is not only an update but a great representation of many of the aspects of life that non-binary and tra…
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Join Joy and Diana to celebrate 4 recent wins (3 national news, 1 personal). Episode 51 explores Diana's experience in advocating for Clark's privacy and non-disclosure for an upcoming (overnight) event. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and re…
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Joy shares an experience that she and Samantha experienced when called by a counselor. Joy and Diana discuss how they believe their children may have more on their minds than academics as they navigate school. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners …
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Diana and Joy celebrate pride month with their 50th episode! Listen in to hear another letter of hope and love, dedicated to any and all who might benefit from being seen and supported. Also, a listener request is shared; listeners in southeastern Wisconsin are invited to join a community discussion on Saturday, June 17th at the Waukesha Public Lib…
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Joy explores what the risks are of assuming that people will all be "good." They discuss the potential "harms." Together, Joy and Diana discuss when they want to share, and how they navigate their lives. They share some ideas of how to "test the waters" around them, and how they look for "winks." They include how they look for those "winks" or sign…
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In this episode, Joy and Diana explore considerations in disclosing their children's transgender identity and in which communities and situations they feel safe to do so. Diana and Joy also reflect on their struggle in engaging authentically with individuals and the community around them, since in most cases they aren't disclosing their identities …
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Diana shares her experience taking Dinah to the Gender clinic to establish care. Diana and Joy discuss how some things have changed and the challenges of attaining care. For clarity, no medical intervention is being offered or requested for Dinah at this time. It is only to establish care and support. If you’re taking something away from our podcas…
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Joy and Diana reflect on a post from a parent about the effect on their family of discussing anti-transgender bills. They discuss the recent changes in various states over the past weeks. They end with hope for the future from an article from Time that you may find here. (https://time.com/6258586/utah-transgender-bill-essay/?utm_medium=email&utm_so…
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Hugh (Small Town Dad) joins us for Episode 45. He and Joy reflect on: 1) their process of reviewing school records, 2) seeking to understand how school board resolutions drive policy change, and 3) sports policy in their school district. Listen in as new insights arise and decisions are made after meeting with the School District’s Assistant Superi…
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Diana talks with her friend Kirby, who shares her journey of her child's transition. They discuss transition as well as navigating society's perceptions of gender diversity and neurodiversity. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provide us with a review; the more listeners and reviews, the …
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Join us for updates as Joy shares the steps she and Hugh are taking to navigate the anticipated Parental Transparency school district policy. Joy and Diana share gratitude for all the “Mr. Rogers” helpers out there - we encourage (and celebrate) your allyship and encourage listeners to thank those in your community who speak and act in support of g…
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In episode 42, Joy shares the new resolution passed in her school district. She discusses the potential impact on her family. As Joy opens up about her emotional journey through their changing landscape, she discusses her family's options. She also walks through Hugh and her plan on how they are approaching this resolution that may become policy. I…
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In Episode 41 we reflect on the universal parental desire to keep our children safe, and both Joy and Diana explore additional considerations for people of trans experience (especially as teens mature into dating and sexual exploration). Listen in to explore questions such as: When is the 'right time' to disclose one's transgender identity to a rom…
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In this episode, Diana and Joy give updates on what has occurred over the past year. Episodes referenced in the order mentioned are: Episode 29: Have Courage Will Travel Episode 23: A (Testosterone) Path Less Talked About Episode 12: Gender-Affirming Estrogen Therapy Episode 38: Permission to Play (Sports) Episode 32: Stepping Out Episode 18: Sibli…
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Join us in episode 39 to reflect on the importance of self-awareness and self-care during stressful times. Diana shares a lesson learned about knowing one's limits, and she encourages us to bring awareness to our individual capacity for handling stress. She and Joy also explore boundary setting, preparing for difficult situations, and navigating an…
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Joy explores the implications of Samantha's desire to play on a competitive volleyball team. She shares what she has learned about USA Volleyball’s gender competition guidelines and how she is navigating the system while trying to maintain privacy. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d take a moment to provid…
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In episode 37, Diana and Joy explore how their children's gender journey has enhanced their lives, including a reflection of gratitude for the lessons learned. November 20th is Transgender Day of remembrance, which is observed to memorialize those who have lost their lives as a result of transphobia. In this episode, we honor those lost by celebrat…
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In episode 36, Joy and Diana explore their increasing sense of fear, as mid-term elections near. In many places around the US, there are laws being considered that would eliminate access to transition-related health care and other laws that consider supporting a child's transition to their true self to be child abuse. Watch: 1. The Problem with Jon…
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Diana & Joy reflect on their learning and insights from the podcast with Chris Hale. Join us as we share additional insights, including Chris’s perspective on his transition and Clark’s struggle with being misgendered at school. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d subscribe and/or take a moment to provide u…
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Diana talks to her good friend, Chris Hale. They share with Diana their journey to understanding their identity as a non-binary person. Chris gives parents advice to consider the things that you say, and meet your child where they are. If you are interested in hearing Chris’s podcast, You Need A Coach B*tch, click here. If you want to learn more ab…
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In episode 33, Diana shares a conversation theme she’s hearing from parents - specifically, a concern that youth are identifying as non-binary and transgender to be trendy. Joy and Diana explore the dangerous implications of parents/guardians questioning their children’s identity, while recognizing it’s in our human nature to question and seek expl…
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Diana shares a new discovery after talking to Clark. She and Joy explore how he got there, and what it means to Diana. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d subscribe and/or take a moment to provide us a review; the more listeners and reviews, the more people we can reach and support. As always, feel free to …
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From challenging gender norms (e.g., boys don't cry) to exploring gender inclusive language, join Joy and Diana as they explore the opportunity for greater awareness and language shifts to create a better world. Listen in to hear about mistakes they've made in assuming gender pronouns and misgendering individuals, and how they are working diligentl…
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Hear how Joy and Diana have navigated health care offices to help them affirm their children. They discuss their experiences before and after a legal name change. They also share some obstacles they have faced along the way. If you’re taking something away from our podcast, we’d appreciate it if you’d subscribe and/or take a moment to provide us a …
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