SWM 144 - Why wives have a complicated relationship with sex and what to do about it. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. One of our supporters posted a question in our forum which led to a bit of a discussion on what men perceive as sexy, and it shook the questioner a bit, because it was radically different from what she had b…

I feel like I have some explaining to do. A couple of weeks ago, I shared that lately, Christina and I have started having sex a lot more than usual. We had more sexual encounters last month than there were days in the month. We’re at about 30 for this month already. This has led to some questions by some people. I wrote a large thread in our suppo…

August 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Exhibitionism No sex in 4 months Should I disclose previous porn struggles to fiancee Other resources What qualifies as mutual masturbation Need rougher sex to orgasm Here are the li…

Agust 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Wife trades chores for sex How to handle no sex due to birth Water-based lube that doesn’t cause UTIs Guy’s relationships always end in affairs Post-childbirth and penis size preferen…

July 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Wife’s love dependent on mood Why don’t you direct people to God? Can’t seem to manage other positions Wife rejects exploration and being seen Nervous about sex outdoors Crossdressing …

SWM 139 - Why won't my spouse do x? I would do it for them. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Recently, I’ve noticed a question popping up all over the place. It’s come up in our supporter forum, coaching sessions, emails, comments in our latest survey, and more. This question points to a fundamental tension in many marriages…

SWM 138 - BDSM Survey Results. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. During July and a bit of August, we ran a survey about people’s BDSM experiences. Depending on who you ask, it was either extensive or just dipping our toes into the topic. In the end, we received over 1,000 complete responses from a wide range of couples, some …

SWM 137 - Why we don't spank our children. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Last week, Gary Thomas posted an article on his substack on the topic of discipline vs. punishment—not taking a stance but rather offering it up as a controversial conversation starter. Reading it made me curious about something—does your view of hel…

June 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Wife thinks she has to be mean to our children Golden showers (again) Wife can’t decide if she loves me or not Just because you’re experienced, doesn’t mean you’re qualified Here are t…

SWM 135 - It's good to try new things. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Most kids, when growing up, enter a picky stage at some point. Some when they’re toddlers, some when they’re young children, some when they become teenagers. When our 3rd or 4th kid entered this phase, everyone knew the response when they didn’t want to …

May 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: How often should a healthy man need sex? Clitoral piercing How do we start talking about sex without hurt feelings? Is it good to masturbate to stay in a sexless marriage Professional n…

SWM 133 - Loving your spouse where they are. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. I often give beginner homework to my coaching clients. A few of them will likely read this and think, “He was talking about me.” You’re not wrong, but you’re also not alone. I give it out frequently because it helps combat some fundamental problems…

SWM 132 - Breast implants and body image issues. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. This episode I'm answer a question I received back in February that I forgot to answer. Here's the question: Hi! To start, I just wanted to say thank you so much for what you do! Your podcast has been immensely eye-opening and helpful! Now, to …

SWM 131 - Tips to fight more effectively in your marriage. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Last week, I shared a list of ideas our Couple’s Night group had that helped build a resilient marriage. At the end of the call, we still had some time and started discussing fighting more effectively. Again, the group came up with so…

SWM 130 - Building Resiliency in Marriage. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. On the first Tuesday of every month, Chris from TheLionWithin.us and I co-host "Couple's Night." Couples from our communities get together to talk about marriage. We discuss struggles, share ideas, tips, and a lot of funny stories. It's an absolute b…

April 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Can Christians be swingers? Chastity devices Sex and orgasm headaches Wife only wants one oral sex position, which he hates Worried about stamina Trying to spice things up Here are th…

SWM 128 - Marriages require recalibration. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. There’s an old quip about how men get married expecting their wives to stay the same, and women get married expecting to be able to change their men, and neither gets what they want. It’s funny because often, there’s an element of truth to this, whic…

March 2024 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Why am I not interested in sexy any more after having a baby? How do I get my wife to rest without guilt? Why does my wife dismiss my advice when she asks for it? How do I get my wife…

SWM 126 - Unspoken nuances of understanding. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Marriage is a cosmic tapestry, a constellation of souls woven into the fabric of time, where vows echo in the heart's language, shaping a journey of shared whispers and laughter. It's a dance of compromise and compassion, a symphony where individua…

SWM 125 - Rethinking Duty Sex. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. I've had a lot of conversations with couples as well as husbands and wives individually lately about what often gets called "duty sex" or "pity sex." For those who don't know, duty/pity sex is when one spouse gives in to sex, not because they desire it themselve…

SWM 124 - My daughter's speech - A vaccine against the epidemic of transgenderism. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Today I've got something a bit different than the usual fare. Last year, for our 100th episode, I had my eldest daughter present her 4H speech as I felt it fit the scope of this blog. This year, she wrote a par…

January and February 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: The monthly masturbation challenge How do I make anal sex enjoyable for her? Periods and vacations and sex Aging and orgasm struggles How do I know if I’m in right? Doe…

SWM 122 - How to make your spouse more attractive to you. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. If you look online, you can find tons of videos, articles, podcasts, products and more about how to make yourself more attractive to your spouse or potential partners. I mean, it's everywhere. You can also find resources to help you ma…

SWM 121 - Why marriage should be hard work. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. I made a post on social media some time ago saying, “Marriage is hard, divorce is hard, choose your hard,” and someone asked me if I then disagreed with some other bloggers and podcasters who say that marriage is and should be easy. This post expand…

SWM 120 - How you may be making your birth control methods ineffective. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. A few years ago, I was talking to a client during a coaching call, and we got off on a bit of a tangent about condom use. I explained a few ways that people tend to lower the protection of condoms when they use them. He w…

November and December 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: How do you use a vibrator? Is roleplaying marriage a sin? Will a dildo make me unsatisfied with my husband? Wife makes excuses about everything When to start talking t…

The traditional wedding vows go something like “I take you to be my wife/husband, and I do promise and covenant, before God and these witnesses, to be your loving and faithful husband/wife in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live.”Unfortunately, I don’t remember my wedding vows. I remembe…

SWM 117 - Why do I want sex when I'm sick? Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Well, it’s winter here, which means cold and flu season. So, of course, the last couple of weeks, it’s been rolling through our family of 7. Christina and I were the last to get it, and it seemed I got it worse than her. She complained about being si…

SWM 116 - Why do I always have to tell my husband how to help? Check out the blog post here for more details and links. Lately, I've noticed a trend on social media where famous creator couples make videos of the wife telling the husband that visitors are coming over and they need to prepare. In response, the husband goes and starts cleaning out th…

October 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Can I use a strap-on on my wife? My husband’s ex-girlfriend What’s a foreskin for? Here are the links I mentioned during the podcast: Intimacy Advent Calendar Hollow strap-on at Mar…

SWM 114 - Understanding and Navigating Sexual Obligations in a Christian Marriage. Check out the blog post here for more details and links. I had a wife ask, Sex should be a gift given freely, and if I don’t have veto power, am I really giving freely? This is my response in light of 1 Corinthians 7:4-5 and the role model Jesus was for us dying on t…

September 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: A husband's changing orgasms Can widowers masturbate Husband won't stop masturbation habit Calling husband "daddy" Feeling guilty about initiating sex Here are the links I mention…

SWM 112 - Do men have it harder when it comes to sexual expectations? Check out the blog post here for more details and links. This podcast episode is answering this question I received from our anonymous Have A Question page: Hi Jay, I've noticed a dichotomy when it comes to expectations for male and female sex drives and what's considered desirab…

August 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Sex in heaven Oral sex positions How to recover from an affair I want to become a mom Here are the links I mentioned during the podcast: SWM 039 - Anonymous Questions from January 20…

July 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: My wife feels disrespected because I notice other women Wife is hurt but not healing after years Wife disconnects during foreplay What can we do during fertile days Oral sex questions …

June 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Crossdressing Reframing "duty" sex Wife gets sex when she wants, but he doesn't Afraid to have more children Here are the links I mentioned during the podcast: Is it wrong for Christia…

SWM 108 - What does the Bible say about hell? Check out the show notes here for more details and links. This podcast episode is a Bible study about the topic of hell. One of the most confusing subjects in Christianity is the topic of hell. I think it's so confusing because most base their beliefs on a handful of passages and then a heavy dose of po…

May 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Wife wants too much sex Couple needs counselling Keep having the same unproductive fight Make boundaries before you start dating Sexy underwear for men Here are the links I mentioned du…

April 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Is it okay to take nude pictures and videos of each other? Limon by Minna discount Asexual wife? Wife loves me, but isn’t in love with me Wife isn’t interested in improving our sex li…

March 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Threesome tempations Aversion to receiving manual and oral sex Penis size Falling asleep during sexy time Here are the links I mentioned during the podcast: Melt - Couples Massage Cou…

February 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Women use sex to control men, so men should be allowed to masturbate Appreciating beauty vs lusting Playlist for sex Tenuto Squeamish about handjobs Another question about masturba…

January 2023 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Phone sex Oral sex to completion Forgiveness and trust after betrayal Are pictures and videos a problem? Increasing female libido naturally What is our duty? Toxic wife Abusive empl…

December 2022 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Does my wife know what I'm doing to her? I want to share orgasms with my husband What are your thoughts on BDSM? Is bondage a problem for me? Wife doesn't like direct clitoral stim…

In this episode El Fury and Sexy Corte discuss what they've learned about sex during their first decade of marriage.If this podcast is a blessing to you, please leave us a 5-star review on iTunes or wherever you listen to podcasts.Related links: How To Help Your Wife Orgasm: https://marriedchristiansex.com/blog/mental-techniques/how-to-help-your-wi…

SWM 101 - Why does my spouse always push for more during sex? Check out the show notes here for more details and links. Today I'm answer this question I received in my inbox: Jay, I enjoyed the book (Introduction to Talking Dirty) that my hubby put on my iPad. The thing is, no matter what I do in my comfort zone, it isn't enough. I do many, I mean …

This is episode 100, and I wanted to do something a little different for our one-hundredth episode, and I was struggling to figure out what that should be. Then an opportunity presented itself. You see, my children are in 4H, and if you don’t know what 4H is, many people describe it as “scouts for farm kids.” That’s not quite accurate, as we have s…

November 2022 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Spouse falls asleep during romantic getaway Husband wants her to wear revealing clothes Public sex Are we responsible for our dreams? How to encourage your spouse to be healthier H…

October 2022 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Where does the energy come from? Mutual masturbation Sharing fantasies and machines Masturbation due to struggles with orgasming Spontaneous / Responsive desire quiz Why do married …

September 2022 Questions from our anonymous Have A Question page. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. In this episode, we are tackling the subjects: Where are you? How to hide bruises What role do I have in God changing my heart? Mother of 3 young kids isn't as interested in sex as husband How to recover from faking orgasms? H…

Why men being submissive is problematic. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. A reader posed the following question: Hi. I wanted to know if there is any reason that the man can't be the submissive part sometimes during sex. Because I feel like I want to be submissive from time to time, but I don't want to ask my wife because i…