The Forgotten Realms through the eyes and voices of a crew of nerdy dads! We occasionally burst into song! We laugh at our own jokes! We make obscure pop culture references! Sometimes we even roleplay!
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Episode 75!! Llork Bane Temple Heist Second Attempt!
2:59:06
2:59:06
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New bugbear rogue Malak leads Neville, VS, Grom, and Sigurd on a new attempt to steal the Stone of Chibharo (aka Stone of Controlling Earth Elementals) from the Baneite temple in Llorkh. After various attempts at using Locate Object, the crew take to the sewers, where they discover some interesting chambers, a thief named Melzak the Mouth stranded …
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Hexcrawl 74 - Llorkh Heist on the Temple of Bane
3:06:48
3:06:48
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New rat-shifter spore druid VS joins new firbolg warlock Tharivol and new dwarf life cleric Gorm, along with returning human hotelier/warlock Neville in another Llorkh caper - this time, the Miner's Cooperative is allying with the local wererats to go after a Stone of Controlling Earth Elementals that the Church of Bane has in its temple. They come…
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Hexcrawl 73 - Return to Bullywug Village and the Bloody Mist of Golem Workshops
3:07:52
3:07:52
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STEVEN III leads Render, Jhank, Bariq, and new goblin messenger Hounddog from the Golem Workshop underneath the (now-dead) cyclops Harpilos' house in search of the control amulet to the shield guardian known as MICHAEL (Mechanical Incident Control Hazardous Area Exploration Lifeform). The amulet once belonged to Caradoc, STEVEN's creator, and he is…
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Hexcrawl 72 - Total Party Kill
2:46:27
2:46:27
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2:46:27
Young bugbear paladin Roff leads Rasprax, Simple Jack, Cassius, and Swift Current to hunt down the goblin necromancer Chetiin, who recently caused an undead outbreak in the Upperthorn Domain. Despite some bad weather, they discover the hideout in a series of caves, and while battling some undead, one zombie flees to raise the alarm. Swift Current p…
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Hexcrawl 71: Cyclops Battle and Abandoned Mine
2:42:55
2:42:55
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2:42:55
Render leads Jhank, Arty, and Swift Current in an epic battle against cyclops cousins Harpalos and Palados, who have finally decided to rid the world of the deceitful guests under Harpalos' house. Palados throws a couple of giant ticks into the mix, Jhank gets big, Arty and Swift move all over the map, and Render mostly shoots from afar until Harpa…
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Hexcrawl 70: Body Switch, Bulette Battle, and Return to Olegs
2:38:42
2:38:42
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2:38:42
Rasprax leads Jorgrim, Swift Current, some pikemen and skirmishers, and two new adventurers - feytouched human sorcerer John Doe/Simple Jack and dwarven forge cleric Bors McCraw - out of the Drow Caves and towards the trading post known as Oleg's where the whole campaign began, carting a wagon full of tin ingots to sell. Along the way the discover …
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Hexcrawl 69 - Snow Scorpions, Deadly Thorns, and Barrow Wights
3:02:15
3:02:15
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Jhank leads Gemwin, Cassius, and STEVEN III on an exploratory expedition out of Axeholm, where they discover the dangers of Snow Scorpion Crevasse, the cruel Thorny Hills, a grotto cave home to crag cats, a griffon nest, a votive shrine to the water goddess Eldath, some barrow wight mounds, the polluted quarry, and the stirge-infested sinkhole, end…
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Hexcrawl 68 - Sigurd's Search for Ivar
2:47:01
2:47:01
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2:47:01
The Llorkh spellcasters Cassius and Kain are joined by War Cleric Sigurd, who is looking for his lost friend Ivar, taken prisoner by the Zhents. With Sigurd leading the way, they cut a deal with Winget Sparrow of the Black Network for some information, then find a drug dealer named Chuka who knows the way to Lost Hope Prison up in the mountains. Th…
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Hexcrawl 67 - Ettin Mine pt 2
2:59:38
2:59:38
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2:59:38
Arty leads Jorgrim, Bariq, MikMek, and Swift Current back into the giants' lair, where they detour into a forge haunted by undead dwarves, who life drain everyone and drop Jorgrim with mummy rot! They retreat back into the open air, then regroup and come back again the following day to take on the remaining giants. A mine cart is used as a diversio…
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Hexcrawl 66 - The Ettin Mine
3:54:49
3:54:49
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3:54:49
Jorgrim leads MikMek, Bariq, Arty and Swift Current to a mine near Lowerthorn territory rumored to have Ettins keeping humans as slaves. Once there, Swift Current wakes a sleeping ogre by trying to steal his chain and a huge, multi-level, all out battle occurs. Several giants are killed and several PCs go down but the lead giants escape - the party…
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Hexcrawl 65 - Retaking Axeholm
3:02:27
3:02:27
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3:02:27
Dwarven paladin Gemwin leads Render, S.T.E.V.E.N. III, Roff, and the survivors of New Ammarindar as they retake the dwarven hold of Axeholm. Roff shows how a very big bugbear fits into a small arrow slit. In the throne room, Gemwin is attacked by a licklash ghoul and other undead start to pour into the room, but the dwarven priests of Dumathoin sum…
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Hexcrawl 64 - The Dwarven Rescue
2:52:45
2:52:45
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2:52:45
Jhank leads Render, new warforged artificer S.T.E.V.E.N. Mk III, new bugbear paladin Roff, and new dwarven paladin Gemwin (yes, that's three new PCs) on an expedition into the Greypeak Mountains to save the survivors of the fall of New Ammarindar, who are sheltering at some abandoned goliath caves. Once there, they decide to look for the abandoned …
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Hexcrawl 63 - Stirges, Cyclopean Ruins, Death by Panther, and Spellcasters Gone Wild
2:31:05
2:31:05
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Elior leads Kain and Neville out into the wilderness near Llorkh, where they get attacked by stirges, find the Red Wizard Tharidun Mirza excavating some mysterious Netherese ruins with a zombie crew that includes the body of their dead friend Zimevos, then they run out of food in the hills. Foraging separately, Elior is attacked and killed by a pan…
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Hexcrawl 62 - The Madness of King Lenny, Frog Wrasslin, and the Lonely Barrow
2:49:37
2:49:37
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2:49:37
Artvirous leads Caradoc, MikMek, and Bariq to destroy the bullywug village but they get taken before King Lenny who declares that Arty is his long-lost son and possible heir. Prince Bodean goads Arty into swimming down into a froghemoth lair, where Arty and Bariq get swallowed whole and MikMek and Caradoc get captured by its tentacles. By the end, …
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Hexcrawl 61 - The Sword of Nightmares
2:36:16
2:36:16
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2:36:16
Sir Parrik leads Bariq, Caradoc, and Arty to deal with a cursed place centered on a standing stone near his domain of Lowerthorn. They demolish the menhir only to find that the effect persists - digging down they discover that there is a malevolent sword there thirsty for blood and looking for a new wielder. Bariq tries to Identify the sword but fa…
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Hexcrawl 60 - Hunting the Green Daggers
3:17:20
3:17:20
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Kain leads Neville, Rustle, and new arcane cleric Cassius on a hunt for the assassins who nearly killed Jahan at the Miners Cooperative warehouse a few weeks ago. They talk to a reporter, get denied entrance to a gambling hall, give a poison sample to an herbalist, and hatch a plot to bring the assailants out into the open. This results in a chaoti…
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Hexcrawl 59 - Deadly Warehouse Collapse and Smuggling the Skull of Larqa
2:50:19
2:50:19
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In Llorkh, Rustle Ironbottom accepts a job from Winget Sparrow of the Black Network to protect his boss Jahan during a meeting with the Miner's Cooperative at a shady warehouse. Rustle, Neville, Zim, and Kain make plans to protect their VIP and try to find a Sleep scroll. On the evening of the meet, things go well until a hit squad shows up and kil…
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Hexcrawl 58 - The Goliath Skull Heist and Nazariel Exfiltration
2:21:54
2:21:54
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2:21:54
Elior takes the lead in Llorkh, where he accepts a job from Gunther Strojny of the Miners Cooperative to recover a magical goliath skull from the Zhents. This involves a young Zhent wizard, Skylar Nazariel, who knows where the skull is held and wants to get out of town. With the help of Kain, Zim, and Neville, Elior plans the heist and also collude…
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Hexcrawl 57 - Wizards and Wagons
3:14:28
3:14:28
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3:14:28
A new party of 1st-level spellcasters heads east towards Llorkh, led by warlock Neville Cavendish. On the way, they fight twig blights, get chased by an ogre, get extorted by some Zhent thugs, and get their horses eaten by a manticore. Upon reaching Llorkh, they go looking for a good place to set up shop and they end up purchasing a rundown inn whi…
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Hexcrawl 56 - Fomorian Hunting
3:31:21
3:31:21
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3:31:21
Gnome druid Jorgrim leads Arty, Swift, and Bariq to hunt down a threat from a misshapen fomorian giant near the Shrine of Lurue. On the way there they encounter some bandits, a bear, a crag cat, some giant snakes, and a few curious settlers, and they borrow some skirmishers from the village of Perfection. Once there, they interrogate a bugbear and …
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Hexcrawl 55 - Incyzor Attacks and Return to the Maze of Moradin
3:02:12
3:02:12
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Dwarven death cleric Thronor leads Jhank, Artvirous, Jorgrim, and Swift Current to try and secure the hexes where the Maze of Moradin and Moradin's Forge are located, but they are attacked by the fang dragon Incyzor, who downs Jhank while everyone else scrambles for cover! Some quick thinking saves Jhank's life and the party explores looking for al…
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Hexcrawl 54 - Dwarven Justice and the Children of Lolth
2:46:13
2:46:13
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Jhank leads Floki, Swift Current, Thronor, and Render to the monastery of the Order of the Burning Forge, where grief-stricken widow Yulia Bronzevow detains them for the murder of her husband Gorya (Episode 34!). They face a dwarven tribunal of justice, and their sentence involves going upriver to battle foul spider-children of the demon queen Lolt…
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Hexcrawl 53 - Saurod's death, Steam Tunnels, Tree Cult, Tatzylwyrm, and the Meenlock Lumber Camp
2:58:07
2:58:07
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2:58:07
Caradoc leads Thronor, MikMek, Render, and new kobold warlock Saurod set out to handle the remaining problems at the Golem Workshop under the house of the cyclops Harpalos. This goes terribly awry when the wraith who haunts the creepy mist observation room life-drains Saurod in a single hit. Thronor drives away the wraith but then animates Saurod a…
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Hexcrawl 52 - The Bubble Under Hightstar Lake
2:49:14
2:49:14
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2:49:14
Arty leads Bariq, Jhank, and Render to Highstar Lake, where they search for the underwater bubble they glimpsed many months ago. They find an enormous bubble protected by arcane traps and considered to be the property of Sh'derra D'zeer, the amethyst dragon who claims the lakebed as her own. They go to investigate rumors that the Wererats of the Ha…
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Hexcrawl 51 - The Golem-Maker's Workshop Under the House of Harpalos
3:06:59
3:06:59
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Render the warforged artificer leads Jhank, Caradoc, Eaglebane, and Bariq to explore the ruined workshops and laboratories underneath the house of the cyclops Harpalos. On the way there they have a run-in with the stone giant Kuljarn, meet some goliath shepherds, and see evidence of ettins in the area. Harpalos welcomes them into his home and allow…
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Hexcrawl 50 - Rescuing MikMek from Razorvine Ruins (and House Rules Discussion)
3:07:39
3:07:39
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When word reaches the higher-level characters in the western forest that MikMek was petrified in the Razorvine Ruins, wildfire druid Bariq leads Artvirous the lizardfolk ranger, Jhank the dwarven rune knight, and Jorgrim the gnome druid back eastward to try to rescue him. Along the way they encounter a hostage situation with some bandits, which the…
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Hexcrawl 49 - Basilisk Battle and Exploring the Southwood
2:52:37
2:52:37
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2:52:37
Continuing their exploration of the Razorvine Ruins, kobold rogue Mikmek leads dwarf paladin Riswynn Ruby-Eye, goliath cleric/rogue Eaglebane, warforged artificer Render and dragonborn rogue/monk Swift Current deeper into the ruined fort. Things go terribly awry when Mikmek opens a door onto a basilisk and fails both petrification saves, getting tu…
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Hexcrawl 48 - South to Razorvine Ruins
2:57:07
2:57:07
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Swift Currrent, a tabaxi rogue/monk reincarnated as a dragonborn, leads kobold rogue Mikmek, goliath rogue/cleric Eaglebane, warforged artificer Render, and new dwarven paladin Riswynn Ruby-Eye in search of some ruins along the Thorn River. Along the way they encounter a leucrotta ambush, some tricky fey boggarts, and a grove of reveling satyrs bef…
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Hexcrawl 47 - Rooting out Rockfire
1:22:17
1:22:17
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1:22:17
Jared guest-GM's a DarkWizard Quest Special Episode! Goblin wizard Litesnak leads Balifra, Bariq, Arty, and Render to a cave where the barghest Rockfire the Magnificent has taken refuge. The party absails in and starts to explore but ends up in a dangerous battle with a roper and the barghest! Eventually the baddies are defeated and some treasure i…
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Hexcrawl 46 - Sootscale Corpse Flower and Return to the Altar of Nomog-Geaya
2:32:58
2:32:58
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Atrvirous leads Bariq, Balifra, Swift, Jorgrim, and Oneiros against the Corpse Flower that has taken over the former Sootscale Caverns complex. They take it on in its zombie-filled lair and cleanse the caverns of its foul stench forever. They leave the skirmisher teams called Lyas Lions there to begin converting it into a base, and the party travel…
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Hexcrawl 45 - Feywild: Mother Wormwood Battle
3:02:10
3:02:10
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Oneiros joins the party in the Feywild and leads Swift, Floki, Mikmek, Jorgrim, and Barriq against the evil archfey hag Mother Wormwood! It quickly turns into a battle on three fronts when a shambling mound and some redcaps join the hag's side. Both sides Entangle each other and after taking out the redcaps Oneiros gets polymorphed into a beached w…
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Hexcrawl 44 - Feywild: Assault on Loomlurch
3:04:03
3:04:03
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3:04:03
Jorgrim leads Bariq, MikMek, Swift, and Floki into the Feywild to find Mother Wormwood's lair! They come across strange tracks, find some mourning blink dogs, and make their way to the fallen-log site of Loomlurch where Mother Wormwood aka Skabatha aka Granny Nightshade is said to dwell. They meet an interesting goblin and split the party when the …
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Hexcrawl 43 - Battle for the Drow Caves
3:16:01
3:16:01
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3:16:01
Rasprax leads Floki, MikMek, Fjori, Oneiros, and new warforged PC Render to a complicated cave system where drow have been raiding from. After MikMek tangles with some scouts, Rasprax sends in a small army of bandits and cultists by the main entrance while the party sneaks in a side water entrance. Epic tabletop battle ensues - we had a huge 5-elev…
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Hexcrawl 42 - Stilt Village and Return to Sootscale Caverns
3:10:47
3:10:47
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3:10:47
We discuss our domain management house rules, then Mikmek leads Arty, Rasprax, Jorgrim, and Oneiros to find out what's been happening with the fey plants at Sootscale Caverns. On the way they investigate the village on stilts, where MikMek gets taken out by a phase spider and has to be rescued. At the caverns, they discover things have gone very ba…
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Hexcrawl 41 - The Altar of Nomog-Geaya
2:39:36
2:39:36
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2:39:36
Fjori leads Barriq, Artvirous, Jorgrim, and dwarven Justiciar Balifra Brightblade down from Haela's Halls to the goblin circus / shrine / lair at the Altar of Nomog-Geaya. They're accompanied by dwarven troops and looking to stop raids by the goblins on their fortress. After falling prey to several goblin pranks and traps, they descend into the tem…
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Hexcrawl 40 - Butchered in the House of Githaleon
2:57:22
2:57:22
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2:57:22
Emerging from the Feywild, Sly Zib Uppercut takes command of Oneiros, Swift Current, Rasprax, and Jorgrim. They first bury Chaz (who died from his Feywild wounds) and then set about trying to discover just where they are. They question the local cat and begin to explore the ruins of an old mansion, but in the basement Sly Zib gets almost killed by …
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Hexcrawl 39 - Moongrave's Eclipse
3:13:49
3:13:49
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Jorgrim leads Rasprax, Chaz, Oneiros, Swift Current, and Sly Zib Uppercut as they infiltrate the hag Moongrave's fortress / theater in the Feywild realm of Yon. The group poses as a troupe of entertainers and puts on a mostly improvised tragedy, then explores the fortress looking for a lost elf who can help cause a false eclipse that will help brin…
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Hexcrawl 38 - The Feywild is Full of Sidequests!
3:08:01
3:08:01
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3:08:01
Teifling barbarian Oneiros takes over as caller in the Feywild, leading Rasprax, Chaz, Jorgrim, Swift Current, and Sly Zib on a series of cascading sidequests! First, they cross the river to find the outlaw Will of the Feywild, who recommends they go seek a Unicorn for advice. High-voiced oil can Squirt joins the party and provides consistent comic…
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Hexcrawl 37 - Death in the Feywild
2:57:44
2:57:44
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2:57:44
Half-drow warlock Rasprax leads Sly Zib, Chaz, Jorgrim, new tabaxi rogue Swift Current and new barbarian Oneiros on an adventure to find out what's happening in the Feywild. They make their way from the Stone Circle to the feywild portal leading into The Night Garden (see episode 02!). After Sly Zib is charmed by a dryad, he is knocked unconscious …
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Hexcrawl 36 - Conquering Haela's Halls
3:00:18
3:00:18
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3:00:18
Dwarf warrior Fjori leads Barriq, Jhank, Artvirous, and Benji to retake a dwarven fortress in the hills that is infested with trolls. On the way there, they discover a hidden valley with many ostriches. Barriq scouts in as a fox but runs into troll trouble, barely escaping back to the party. In a nighttime assault on the fortress, they end up in co…
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Hexcrawl 35 - Gorya's Funeral, Mountain Journey, and Sootscale Visit
2:50:53
2:50:53
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2:50:53
Jhank leads Floki, Thronor, Sir Parrik, Benji and Caradoc as they invite Yulia Bronzevow and Nastasia Tinspike for a peace summit and Gorya's funeral. Thereafter, the party sets out through the mountains towards Sootscale Caverns, discovering a windy agate mine and a stone circle used by Talos druids along the way. They are attacked by owlbears and…
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Hexcrawl 34 - The Maze of Moradin and the Ravings of Gorya Bronzevow
3:30:23
3:30:23
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3:30:23
Gnome trickster Floki Flanfloom leads Jhank, Thronor, Sir Parrik, Caradoc, and Benji to discover what's become of the missing dwarven monk Gorya Bronzevow, who disappeared into a labyrinth within the mountains. Aboveground, his wife Yulia and former mistress Nastasia each lead a faction of the Order of the Burning Forge and conflict simmers between…
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Hexcrawl 33 - Search for the Lost Temple of the Forest
2:52:51
2:52:51
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2:52:51
Guided by a vision shown to him by the unicorn goddess Lurue, Sir Parrik leads MikMek, Artvirous, Benji, Caradoc, and Rasprax on an exploration of the northeastern Southwood in search of a lost temple in the forest. Along the way they encounter some giant wasps, several gruesome scenes of dead trappers, and converse with the local fey. Mikmek gets …
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Hexcrawl 32 - Leaving the Ship, Pod Plant Battle, and Across the Moorland
2:45:18
2:45:18
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2:45:18
Benji the Bard leads Thronor, Jorgrim, Jhank, and Sly Zib as they try to figure out what the crystal DarkWizard wants so much actually does. They travel toward the hunting lodge and find the mud bowl with mushrooms that the Old Beldame talked about, but unfortunately it's got a bodytaker plant and some pod people, so combat ensues in which Sly Zib …
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Hexcrawl 31 - Lost in the Greypeaks, Bloody Trapper Camp and the Ship on the Cliff
3:03:23
3:03:23
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3:03:23
Thronor the dwarven death-cleric leads gnome druid Jorgrim, dwarven rune knight Jhank, halfling artificer Caradoc, and new human bard Benji south from the Temple of Dumathoin in search of the Adder River and the ship on a cliff seen by the DarkWizard in his vision. They visit Karg the Manticore in the ruins of the fire giant sorcerer's tower, get l…
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Hexcrawl 30 - Low-level Forest Exploration Messaround
2:34:35
2:34:35
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2:34:35
Eaglebane leads MikMek and new bard Benji into the northeastern portion of the Southwood, where they hunt an elk, find several disturbing sets of trees, and battle some skeletons. They infiltrate a trapper camp, discover a drow cave, and discover that the Bignose Goblins are occupying the ruins of Eldergrove village. Benji writes several songs abou…
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Hexcrawl 29 - Lost in the Woods and DarkWizard's Tower
2:49:49
2:49:49
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2:49:49
Fjori (dwarf fighter) leads Chaz (halfling monk), Bariq (fire genasi druid), Eaglebane (goliath fighter), and Sir Parrik (fairy paladin) to try to find the mysterious DarkWizard and take away his magical glasses, but along they way they have some trouble. They visit with some dwarf prospectors, get driven off by an angry farmer, and get a bit turne…
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Hexcrawl 28 - The Dangers of Highstar Lake
2:42:13
2:42:13
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2:42:13
Jhank, Sly Zib Uppercut, and Sir Parrik take their keelboat on an exploration of the eastern portion of Highstar Lake, where they first discover a swamp witch who mainly just wants to be left alone. She warns them of several dangers but offers a quest for some magical mushrooms away up a river to the northeast. They begin to explore the northern co…
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Hexcrawl 27 - Ankheg Tragedy and the Dragon Barrow
3:18:20
3:18:20
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3:18:20
Floki leads Caradoc, Jorgrim, and new halfling monk Chaz to go investigate the disappearance of dwarven monk leader Gorya Bronzevow, but on the way there, they stop to eradicate the growing ankheg problem at the Old Sycamore. Tragedy strikes as the mama ankheg burrows right up to Floki and crits on him, one-shotting him into unconsciousness, and fi…
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Hexcrawl 26 - The Worg Monastery
2:56:16
2:56:16
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2:56:16
Sir Parrik leads Barriq, Jhank, and Arty northeast from the Dungeon of the Hark to clean out a monastery inhabited by Worgs. They discover that the worgs are cursed former monks of Auril, cruel goddess of the cold, and the pack's leader Gazrith gives them safe passage into the undercrypt to try to break the curse. In the crypt they fight ghouls led…
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