Saying the things you only think about in private but with less shame
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Death Of The Dapper Dads: Part 1, Chapter 1, Sequence 1
2:31:03
2:31:03
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THE FINAL EPISODE! What do you even say at a time like this? It feels like we've already said it all we just don't remember exactly what it was. We say some things in this episode also. Some of the usual and some sincere things for once. Thanks to everybody who ever listened to us regardless of how much and how often. We will never understand but a…
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EPISODE 176! #9 of the FINAL 10! We discuss drinking early, how we would kill someone, a female Slim, playing with a bunch of dogs, speaking in third person, ice cubes, a man that drives up and yells at you about stuff, twins and coke, not lasting long while cooking pizza, a lot of Michael McDonald, pee sink, the repercussions of eating burgers, th…
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EPISODE 175! #8 of the FINAL 10! We discuss being suspects in each others deaths, edible underwear, having half a kid, causing a scene in an Olive Garden, the tv show Perfect Strangers, a little league game, horny goat weed, final jerks, making and finding a sex tape, a breakfast mac and cheese and much more GET YOUR SUBMISSIONS IN ASAP! WE'RE ALMO…
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EPISODE 174! #7 of the FINAL 10! We discuss putting the dog down, teeth, a world class freakout, hot foods, bong water, a creepy man, doing a driveby and guns in general, the Miser brothers, a Human Centipede scenario, going to the Trapt show, babies and much more. GET IN YOUR SUBMISSIONS WHILE YOU CAN!! www.patreon.com/dapperdads is still poppin' …
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EPISODE 173! #6 of the FINAL 10! There are some very weird and annoying audio issues in this one but we think for the most part it's still decent. We discuss The Chronicles of Narnia, old timey candy, bad Onlyfans, catchy songs, jerking together, waterparks, a retired doctor, swallowing food, Megadeth, a submission with a bunch of would you rathers…
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EPISODE 172! #5 of the FINAL 10! We discuss Cherry Poppin' Daddies, Fuel energy drink, using dynamite, a confusing hat, being propositioned for a cigarette, a party in the balls, a detailed recap of Drama's return to the doctor, having nice dick days, still not wanting to smell farts, what game show we want to be on and much more. GET YOUR SUBMISSI…
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Wiping And Pulling Out Staples
1:32:05
1:32:05
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EPISODE 171! #4 out of the FINAL 10! We discuss yoga, standing on money to become taller, rockstars that should be dead, best way to do drugs, airing out horny texts post death, air bud, Victoria's Secret, coins, cigarette butts, sweaty men smells, missing birds, a husband with a special talent, gym floors and much more GET YOUR SUBMISSIONS IN BEFO…
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EPISODE 170! #3 out of the FINAL 10! We discuss a Van Halen mashup, bumping into a dedicated fan in the future, Drama's new podcast, "updates" on Slim's "health", a dead parent party, being large horny, which one of us is the looks (and the brains), an intense workplace story, our roles in a heist and much more. GET YOUR SUBMISSIONS IN NOW OR NEVER…
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The Shattered Pelvis Spectacular
1:28:20
1:28:20
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EPISODE 169! #2 of the FINAL 10! We discuss the act of 69ing, a well lit butthole, some wifi issues, meetings with the devil, farts and crap, an intense recap of Slim's recent injury, Drama's dads hands, a submission test and much more. GET YOUR SUBMISSIONS IN BEFORE WE'RE DONE (WHICH IS SOON) www.patreon.com/dapperdads is still poppin' Call/text 4…
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EPISODE 168! #1 of the final 10 episodes! We discuss using your genie wish to see a friend's pain, being delicate in the butt, Onlyfans (again), no longer having the concept of time, shitty Walmart employees and shitting with Walmart employees, unusual lubricants, poor performances, first jerks and ejacts, a story from another podcast and much more…
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EPISODE 167! WE HAVE A VERY BIG ANNOUNCEMENT! Listen to find out what it is. We also discuss recording in a different place again, a dad prank, campfire smells, smoking the wrong end of a cigarette, our love for The Big Bang Theory, breathing, how ventilated places actually need to be, washing your legs, Catdog, penis pumps, reality tv shows and mu…
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EPISODE 166! We discuss soft pretzels, a Starbucks exchange, pretty fast food employees, restaurants where the workers are purposely mean to you, large hashbrowns, Slim's new toy, a recap of Drama's vacation including high mountain driving, a battle against the sun, the Smoky Mountains, a really cool bartender, some wild brats, an ocean adventure a…
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You Know What I Like The Most? Cake Farts
1:32:40
1:32:40
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EPISODE 165! We discuss celebrity dick pics, spooky jerks, muff diving, thumbs, dating the female versions of ourselves, charley horses and hiccups, old crazy internet things, post nut pee streams, new wild rap lyrics, meeting real dads and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads go get it Call/text 402-7DAPPER (402-732-7737) with something already j…
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EPISODE 164! We discuss man on man boning, a typical doctor visit, coffee lids, Mythbusters, Sublime WITH Rome, Fat Mike and his fat breasts, Gary Busey Pet Judge, Viking funerals, the 9 different types of boobs, Rubik's cubes, our McDonald's meal pitch, a Dairy Cream conspiracy and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you just can't get enough…
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The Juiciest Hot Little Center Of Pink Ham
1:28:35
1:28:35
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1:28:35
EPISODE 163! We discuss us as Sims, napping, a tubing injury, party pizzas, jumping off a bridge, more about the giant check in the basement, our anger at Taco Bell, keeping your severed leg and eating it, hot hams, blowjob pranks, a dream with 21 Savage and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you need more Call/text 402-7DAPPER (402-732-7737)…
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Go To The Basement And Get Some Paper
1:34:58
1:34:58
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EPISODE 162! We discuss celebrity smoking photos, extra big milk, a giant check, where to take the man you think might be your dad, a kilt guy, the confusing lyrics of Blinded By The Light, a time travel situation, jellyfish and peeing, Scott Ian, the perfect t-shirt, a nice cold Coors, some Kid Rock facts and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads …
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EPISODE 161! We discuss old rap lyrics, awkward store interactions, ordering donuts, mistaking the abuse we do to our bodies for COVID, forgetting an important piece of equipment, the cafeteria above us, a shared stomach experience, a very slippery dock, taking some time off from your kids, mini putt, a submission with 3 quick ones, being 20 in the…
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Hulk Heroin: The Taco Bellcast Part 2
1:26:59
1:26:59
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EPISODE 160! We hope you've always really wanted to hear two grown men get drunk and eat Taco Bell because then this episode is for you. We discuss a real rodeo scenario, finally ordering a bidet, hot dog debates, examining a junk drawer, a Hulu conundrum, deodorant and armpit issues, a submission about hats, how many buttchugs it takes, our person…
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EPISODE 159! We discuss true miracles, where the jerking happens, HJ's and what it would take to do them to each other, your second wife who is hot and stupid and inevitably bangs your son, cigarette umbrellas, when it's acceptable to hoot and holler, how phones ruined debates, old school texting, a pickle family, confusing questions and much more.…
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EPISODE 158! We discuss being sexual, our obsessions, fun phone pranks, egging things, a messy court case, noses on pumpkins, updog, mumu dresses, WAP, deathbeds, tying off, Taj Mahal, some random dreams, nu metal band updates and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you want more Call/text 402-7DAPPER (402-732-7737) with something horny Leave …
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The Prophecy Of Foghorn Leghorn
1:35:21
1:35:21
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EPISODE 157! We discuss the lost hot noodle footage, having a baby at 93, the shenanigans of Motley Crue, selecting the perfect balls, traps from Saw movies, sunburns, the old man from the Six Flags commercials, the recap of our cabin weekend and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you really like us Call 402-7DAPPER (402-732-7737) with someth…
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Hot Dads: The 3 Year Episode
1:23:28
1:23:28
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EPISODE 156! 3 YEARS! We made it by barely trying. We celebrate by attempting a stupid challenge. We also discuss ramen, eggs, doing drugs while making love, sketchy porn sites, switching our organs and much more. Thanks to everyone who has stuck with us this far. *the video we keep referring to in the episode actually got messed up for the exact p…
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EPISODE 155! We discuss the monster that controls this, Floor Is Lava, how many seconds long the podcast should be, drive-thru protocol, porn fans, a surprise gape, drinking pop, Smoke on the Water, a new rapper, peeing, nose hair trimming, Hot Pockets, eating burritos, the fat motorcycle twins and much more. www.thedapperdads.com for everything yo…
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Creature From The Ass Lagoon
1:31:46
1:31:46
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EPISODE 154! We discuss stuff that would kill previous generations, a police chase, words and accents, buffets, straws, recap of the dadsquad reunion, some vomit, angry drinking, finally experiencing pure ecstasy, squatty potty, returning pants, losing your virginity and more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you're cool Call/text 402-7DAPPER (402-732…
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Blink 182's "I Had To Autoerotic Asphyxiate My TV On Christmas"
1:29:11
1:29:11
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EPISODE 153! We discuss throwing food, reminiscing to when the world was normal, the super sun, the Dapper museum, our future, a large massage device, a big whoopsie live on the episode, our drive-in tour, missing concerts, dropkicks, performing surgery, Joe C, a reformed dadsquad, the origins of Spongebob and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads …
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WE'RE BACK TOGETHER AND IT FEELS PRETTY REGULAR. In this historic episode 150 we discuss having to recreate the dungeon, curses, squirrels, being stopped by a cop, a new tv network, the loss of the monitor, Navy recruits, having sex while a plane crashes, picking up a grill, kids in bathrooms, the truth about JFK, a fun new money saving technique, …
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Before Croissan'wich / After Denny’s
1:26:59
1:26:59
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EPISODE 152! We discuss taint payments, gas station snacks, beer haters, eunuchs, BC/AD, drinking until you break your brain, fireworks, the new and improved super sun, dropping your child on their head, people with holes in their body causing beer to fall right thru, pizza toppings, chicken dumpling soup, Tesla the band, smearing and much more. Ca…
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EPISODE 151! We discuss funeral plans yet again, cherries, fast food fist fights, greasy shirts, spiciness, shirts vs. skins, large shorts, a submitted would you rather, 2 liters, diapers, loofas, a text about true family love, Father's Day and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads it's better over there www.thedapperdads.com for everything in one …
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EPISODE 150! We discuss a recent split personality disorder, a Ray Romano clone, a big jar of spit, grandma broth and breasts, the Boss Baby, pressing the button, Shake and Bake, shaken baby syndrome, meth, Bad News Bears, foie gras, a new Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwich, confusing microwave setting buttons, a large new product, a Drama lookalike and…
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Feces/Scat/Poop: The Nasty Episode
1:26:37
1:26:37
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EPISODE 149! We discuss chipmunks, Chippendales, carpeting, a big barf incident, soda machine issues, boobs vs. bewbs, pulling the plug, a colon cleanse update, a fun fact from a gas pump, dump comparisons, Bob the Scat Cleaner, trying to better your life but then missing your alarms, a brief but scary intermission, an email, the free Tootsie Pop I…
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EPISODE 148! We discuss GTAV tips, exploding wieners, Crocs, a colon cleanse, barfing and spitting, being in each others bodies in a fun way, Drama's accident, an interesting business card, more combo fast food locations, a greasy old shirt idea and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads for so much more fun stuff Call/text 402-7DAPPER (402-732-7737…
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EPISODE 147! We discuss finding the perfect melon, big steaks, an almost exclusively olive sandwich, being extremely thirsty, upper deckers, owning a fast food franchise, several Taco Bell updates, on open marriage with condiments, a Willy Wonka crossover no one asked for, what people know you for, a new basketball move, some Jordan assumptions and…
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Where Am I, What's Happening?
1:29:38
1:29:38
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EPISODE 146! We discuss sweating, blumpkin logistics, Taco Bell, eating and drinking, meeting in person again, huffing stuff, powdered wigs, Cap'n Crunch, combo fast food places, breadsticks, Little Caesar's merch, a dog park incident, some fun movie quotes, a submission about the struggles of the podcast and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads f…
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Thick Slink And Menacing Potato Head
1:26:32
1:26:32
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EPISODE 145! We discuss current horny levels, taking a direction with the podcast, our Candyman reboot, erotic Toy Story, window cleaning, thick cartoons, the worlds largest penises, an eagle transformation, another new movie pitch, Alex Jones updates, a specific spit shine and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads for the real neat stuff Call/text…
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EPISODE 144! We discuss more about the hit song You Can Call Me Al, cashing ass checks, returning a rare drink, being tall in public, festival breasts with the lactation incident, baby drugs, Dr. Drew, ejaculating inside yourself, an eccentric ass position, sunning your butthole, stupid ginger beer, being big browsers and much more. www.patreon.com…
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EPISODE 143! We discuss news reporter personality, old woman riding, wearing wet clothes, Chris Farley, strokin', different paper cutters, ball trimming, becoming new and improved after quarantine, Wonderballs, researching grills and patio furniture, burger measurement, the big c-word, opening the church of Limp Bizkit and in a podcast first we los…
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EPISODE 142! Still separated we discuss cartoon vampires, Frankenberry beef, a rare Kiss t-shirt, hair updates, the giant baby from Twitter, the hit song You Can Call Me Al, early swear words, dad/yacht rock, a fan submitted email, fallen Taco Bell soldiers, guilty pleasures and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you need to fill your free ti…
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EPISODE 141! We discuss two dogs turning into 302 dogs, first cigarettes, swallowing food, Extreme Love, a burping fetish/Patreon, a jerking lesson submission, Slim's mean ol' lady, a whole bunch of would you rather questions, our Google search history and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads if you need more of us Call/text 402-7DAPPER (402-732-7…
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EPISODE 140! As we turn out the lights and flip the sign in the dungeon to CLOSED we still manage to keep the show going for some reason. Despite the chaos and distance we manage to discuss final words to an ex, noodles, facial hair, a tiny demon, drinking hand sanitizer, Slim's general location, Tiger King, loud cars, a Scooby Doo breakdown, Billy…
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EPISODE 139! We discuss foosball, hidden food, Nightmare Before Christmas and XXXmas, more long screams, the joys of paperwork, 100 Humans, ball cleaning, more wiping, a hot bottle of pee, one man's cold journey, open wounds, when siphoning goes wrong, Julia Fox drinking from an udder, Julie Stiles/Childs, Urethra Franklin and much more. www.patreo…
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EPISODE 138! We discuss some Maytag man confusion, the creation of a new religion, Danzig's new movie, crazy early internet, toe problems, Oregon Trail times, burrito cooking, the return of the asshole, Wild Wild West, years of life that don't matter, jerk off gel, some would you rathers, a bee costume or something, 17th of all and much more. www.p…
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EPISODE 137! We discuss fun words, mermaids, footjobs, ballbusting, bad baby names, flan, a marry/fornicate/kill, an email all the way from Australia, spittoons, the thrilling conclusion to the hotel humping story, sex things you don't do as an adult, a bar for dorks, how to cry and much more. www.patreon.com/dapperdads for all the good stuff Call/…
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Af The Dapper Dads
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Af The Dapper Dads
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Af The Dapper Dads
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Mono E Romano: The Monitor Episode
1:28:47
1:28:47
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Af The Dapper Dads
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